Help at hand

A sympathetic ear, a shoulder to cry on — support groups are becoming the distressed Mumbaikar’s best friend. Experts say they may become a mini-industry

Akila Maheshwari seemed to have the perfect life: a happy family, a good job in a private concern and financial independence. Then in 1992, she was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and started having delusions. She suspected her phone was being tapped and would “see” hidden messages in magazines and newspapers.

Lucky for Maheshwari, 47, that phase was shortlived. With clinical help, she was better and back at work shortly after. Then in 2002, she set up the Nodal Association for Mental Illness (NAMI), a support group for people like herself.

“Schizophrenia carries a stigma, even in today’s society,” she says. “At NAMI, we are a group of 20-30 people who meet once a month to share our strengths and concerns. It’s important to know we are not alone in this fight to return to a normal life.”

Organisations like Maheshwari’s are not uncommon in Mumbai, a city which, like any other modern metropolis, has its share of physio-psycho-social disorders. There are support groups for HIV+ people, divorcees, single mothers, senior citizens and those with mental health ailments, to name a few. Groups are mushrooming everyday, trying to be friend-and-family to victims or bringing niche issues to the fore.

If support groups are popular, it proves there is a need for them, says Dr Harish Shetty, social psychiatrist and founder of Maitri, an organisation for schizophrenia that has more than 5,000 members.

“Our fast-paced life prevents us from talking to each other about our problems,” he says. “When communities and families start shrinking, there is a need for an alternative forum to discuss personal issues or simply share experiences. Support groups are providing that forum today.”

Like PODS (Parents of Downs Syndrome), co-founded in 1992 by Geeta Sejpal. One of newest members is Lavlina Joshi, whose 11-year-old son Vishesh has Downs Syndrome, just like Sejpal’s son. But Vishesh is a Special Olympics champion, a topper in school and has also played a small role in a Hindi film — breaking the myth that he might be more challenged than other kids his age. Joshi wants people to know that. “Initially, I did not know such a group existed,” says Joshi. “It has helped not only Vishesh, but me as well.”

 Psychiatrist Anjali Chhabria, who runs the clinic MindTemple in Juhu, agrees. “These groups are a platform for people to find empathy and time both from — and for — others. In the last few years, there have been many new ones, and the numbers will keep growing,” she says.

Seven years ago, when Reshma Basu, 49, separated from her husband of 23 years, she needed to get her balance and her self-esteem back. “Indian society doesn’t accept a single woman easily,” she says. “But I wanted to be accepted the way I am,” she says.

Basu joined Single Again, one of the support groups started by Dr Chhabria.“Support groups are informal gatherings with no agenda,” she says, of her experience. “No one judges you. Today I can proudly say I’ve never been happier.”

There’s a downside to this, feels Dr Shetty. “People become influenced by others and stop being themselves,” he says. “The group becomes a cocoon and it becomes difficult for some people to adjust to the outside world, which defeats the purpose of a support group. In some cases, groups try to make money of people’s crises.”

Some psychiatrists, however, feel such organisations will soon become a standalone social structure. “These groups will start working like a business house,” says Dr Shetty. “They will become corporate in their approach, streamline functions and cater to specific sections within the same segment.”