Laptop: The 'other' in our lives

It looks like the concept of spending quality time together is slowly fading away among couples, with most preferring to spend more time on their laptops than with each other in the bedrooms.

A study, which was carried out by Ikea on two million Britons, has indicated that couples are spending more time looking at their laptops in the bedroom than they do looking at each other. It also stated that more and more people are putting their relationships at risk by using laptops in bed.

India is not too far away either. Gauri Ramkumar, an advertising professional, says, "I have really tight work schedules and a cantankerous husband at home who hates it if I am not at home on time. So, I have to bring work home. After putting my five-year-old to sleep, I have my dinner and then sit down to work and that work happens to be in bed sometimes. And there are times when I can't talk to my husband."

Gauri isn't the only one. Young urban couples, who work crazy hours and deadlines, are moving apart for the same reason. And while some blame it on work, there are quite a few men who 'need' their laptops in bed. "I can't sleep unless I've played a few games," says Munir Rahman, adding, "My wife has resigned to the fact that I am not very different from our kids so she doesn't say anything anymore."

Christine Northam, a counsellor with Relate, warned the obsession with technology could lead to relationship problems. "Modern technology provides us with brilliant tools but when its use becomes excessive and clutters the bedroom, it can actually get in the way of relationships," the Daily Mail quoted her as saying. "Technology is a major distraction and can lead others to think you're avoiding them," she added. Christine said that to avoid complication in relationships, it is always better to talk with your partner while in bed. "A quiet chat is a great way of connecting with family and friends," she says, adding, "We need to make time to talk face to face. When you're in bed, it's the perfect time to turn off the tech and tune in."

Unfortunately, it's easier said than done. The advent of cooler gadgets is a brilliant distraction, as most young and middle-aged gadget-freaks would admit. "I can't imagine not having my iPhone by my side when I go to sleep," says Madhuleka Aich, a freelance writer. "I need to chat with my friends for at least 10 to 15 minutes before I shut my eyes and check what's happening on Facebook etc — and I don't care if my husband cribs because he does the same thing on weekends when I lock away my gadgets just to spend time with him!" she ends.