The fat is in the fire

On May 1, 2014, Gabourey Sidibe gave the speech of her life at the 2014 Annual Gloria Awards. "It's hard to get dressed up for award shows and red carpets when I know I will be made fun of because of my weight," said the Oscar-nominated actress, referring to the constant barbs about her size. "This is what I deal with every time I put on a dress… when I'm being interviewed by a fashion reporter, I can see it in her eyes, 'How is she getting away with this? Why is she so confident? How does she deal with that body?'"

Sidibe eventually received a standing ovation after flipping the bird to 'fat shamers' everywhere. But so deep-rooted is the discrimination against obese, overweight, and even average-bodied people, that we are seldom shocked by the flagrancy of it all.

Take for instance the time when Michelle Obama – an advocate for healthy living and eating – was told she "needed to drop a few" by Fox News' resident psychiatrist Dr Keith Ablow. Or when Instagram deleted the account of 19-year-old Samm Newman because she uploaded selfies of her plus-size body in a bra and boy shorts. That Instagram is replete with pictures of slim women in underwear and bikinis only adds fuel to the fire.
As the founder of Plus Size Models India, Sana Saini is all too familiar with the notion of fat shaming. "Many beautiful people are made to feel unattractive only because of their weight. Body shaming can have severe consequences on self-esteem," says the part-time designer. Saini also reveals how difficult it is to stay afloat in an image-conscious industry. Designers, she says, are neither willing to hire plus-sized models nor accommodate her requests for plus-sized shows.

Body negativity isn't exclusive to women. Thickset baseball player Prince Fielder was bombarded with jibes on social media after he posed nude for ESPN The Magazine's '2014 Body Issue'. "BRB, putting bleach in my eyes," said a Twitter user. "How am I going to explain Prince Fielder's Body Issue cover to my children?" asked another.
So ingrained is the desire for slenderness that anyone with some heft or girth is considered flawed. But psychiatrist Harish Shetty says that body shaming is the refuge of the inferior. "People who indulge in it get their sense of security by making others feel powerless," he says, adding that you will only feel humiliated if you lack self-confidence. "How you feel should define how you look, not the other way round. But if your self-worth is based on your looks, body shaming will affect you faster."

Therapist Varkha Chulani sees body shaming as a form of bullying. Constant ridicule can trigger depression, eating disorders and suicidal tendencies in extreme cases. "Weight gain can have many causes – genetic predisposition, hormonal problems, a thyroid disorder. Fat shaming serves no purpose except push someone into becoming more withdrawn and eating more. Food becomes the only pleasant aspect – a source of comfort, a coping mechanism."

Chulani has a point. A study in the peer-reviewed journal PloS ONE found that overweight people, who were humiliated were more likely to gain more weight or, at best, remain the same size. Aakanksha Das, a 26-year-old systems analyst who struggled with sudden weight gain due to medical reasons, concurs. "I don't need people to remind me about my weight everyday. As author Lesley Kinzel said, shame is not a catalyst for change. It keeps you in one place, very, very still."

The portrayal of overweight and fat people in show business hasn't helped either. Playback singer Uma Devi Khatri was in the league of songstresses like Shamshad Begum before she became pigeonholed as 'Tun Tun, the fat comedienne'. "Music director Naushad used her in films like Natak and Dard because she had a lovely ring of 'punjabiyat' in her voice. Although her singing career isn't forgotten, Tun Tun is remembered more for her weight," says film historian Raju Bharatan.

But actress Delnaaz Irani says the outlook for plump actresses is anything but bleak. "I've always been confident about my body, so my weight has never been my weakness. I use my body to my advantage. I feel I've given respectability to the 'friend's role' in films and on TV. That way, I have my own space and am no threat to anybody," she explains.

Stand-up comedian Jeeveshu Ahluwalia, who calls himself the 'Salman Khan of the fat world', also doesn't view his weight as a drawback. "I've always been lucky to date people out of my league," he jokes, and adds that there's nothing wrong in having his weight being a recall value in the minds of audiences.

Not deriving your self-worth from what others think of you goes a long way in making you feel secure and happy, says Dr Chulani. And, like Gabourey Sidibe said in the conclusion to her Gloria Awards speech: "If I hadn't been told I was garbage, I wouldn't have learned how to show people I'm talented... If they hadn't told me I was ugly, I never would have searched for my beauty. And if they hadn't tried to break me down, I wouldn't know that I'm unbreakable."

roshni.nair@dnaindia.net, @savagespacetaco

#And the fatterati says

On 4th September, #EveryFatPersonSays topped India trends on Twitter. Here's a sample:

@ShwetaMansingh #EveryFat PersonSays shut up or I'll sit on you. (At least that's how I threaten people :$ )

@TusharB1804 A fat person doesn't say anything.. he just eats #EveryFatPersonSays

@rohanramgude Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out. #EveryFatPersonSays

@lucky_sukhpreet #EveryFat PersonSays obesity runs in my family. ME: Well, seems to me like NO ONE RUNS IN YOUR FAMILY..!!

@NigelBritto #EveryFatPersonSays (mentally, to me as s/he enters the elevator) "Don't think I didn't see you glancing at the load limit."

@Shahrcasm #EveryFatPersonSays I am in a Shape ! Round is a Shape !