Notes from disastrous 'matrimonial dates'

I am 28 and single and in that phase where I am expected to get married to a 'nice' guy and settle down. Since I am not dating, it has become the life mission of everyone around to bring marriage proposals for me because, they all know 'a nice guy'. As a result, I've been on a date binge of late, meeting a 'nice' guy practically every weekend.

I have sat across guys who have asked me the most bizarre questions, lectured me on Hinduism and morality and questioned my profession — all on a first date. While it is acceptable to have expectations and curiosity, what put me off were the questions I was asked and the mind-numbing conversations that followed.

Some comments made me laugh for their sheer hilarity, some really pushed the button. Once, a guy said to me: "So, you are a journalist. That must be so boring!" When I asked him why he thought so, he didn't feel inclined to explain.

At first, such disastrous dates left me upset and annoyed but soon enough, I learnt to laugh at them. Humour helped me to even put up with an 'odorous date' — I met this man whose body odour could have resurrected a dead rat! While I couldn't rush out of there, I found the song from F.R.I.E.N.D.S playing in my head: Smelly cat, smelly cat…

Soon, a sense of monotony began to set in. Seven of the 10 guys would invariably ask the same kind of questions: 'Will you continue to work in the media after marriage?', 'You have long working hours?', 'How often do you have to travel for work?' And my favourite; 'Can you cook?' For the love of God, why are so many men stuck up on this? There've also been a few marvellous men who went a step ahead and broke all the lakshman rekhas of misogyny, and said: "I want to make one thing very clear, though I'm okay with a working partner (thanks for your permission), if there is an emergency at home, I expect my partner to leave office at once and return home.Work is not important, but family is." Here's a little something about this guy — he is okay with a working partner because his sister has been working and so he thinks he will have to allow his partner to work.

It's been one hell of a roller-coaster ride and has left me wondering if there really are any good guys around. Just when I'm signing off with this thought, I hear my mother discussing horoscopes with yet another prospective groom. The dread of such first dates overtakes my hopeless optimism that may be — may be this one may just be the Mr Nice Guy.

LAUGH IT OFF
A few more absurd conversations from my coffee table:

Gender disparity: "I'm not very comfortable with your work timings. I don't think you will be able to balance work-home life." (While he worked 14 hours a day, six days a week)
It's all about money, honey: He asked me, "What's your salary?" (10 minutes into the date)

Meet the snobs: This SoBo snob lamented there were no places to chill and have beer at in the suburbs. There was also a 'suburban snob' who told me, "I don't like to go outside Juhu, it's so crowded and the traffic outside Juhu is maddening."

Since I have been reporting about the traffic issues in the city, I told him that traffic-wise, Juhu is one of the worst areas in the suburbs. Needless to say, he didn't take that very well. Another guy kept whining about the fact that he had to travel all the way to Malad from Vile Parle to meet me, even though we had mutually decided on the location!

Media hatred: He asked: "So how do you get all the information about what's happening around? Let me guess, internet? Because everything is just available out there. What do you guys really do then? Just sensationalise news? Chase celebrities? No real work now, for media, is there?