The pain still lingers on

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Fifty-seven-year old Dheeraj Rathod's day begins just as everybody else's: going through the morning rigours of brushing, bathing et al, except with a small yet significant difference. He is assisted in everything by his wife, as it's no longer possible for him to carry out his activities with a single hand.

An employee of the Central Excise Department in Lower Parel, Rathod, is a survivor of the blasts that took place in Mumbai on July 11, 2006, yet he did not escape unscathed. "I lost an arm, my right arm," he gestured, "And my right ear got blown away."

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A resident of Borivali, Rathod was travelling in the first class compartment that blew up. "Initially I did not know this….for when the blast took place, I immediately became unconscious. Later the police told me that explosive was on the luggage rack, right next to my arm, with which I was holding onto the rack. It was a miracle that I survived, for the rest of the people nearby were all immediately killed," he says.

Bleeding profusely, an unconscious Rathod was rushed to the V N Desai Hospital in Santa Cruz, where he just regained consciousness for barely a moment to mumble his telephone number before sinking back into the dark depths of unconsciousness.

"My wife told me that I was unconscious for the whole of four days. On the fifth day, I regained consciousness….but I found my right arm amputated and my right ear blown away," he stated calmly about what was clearly an agonising moment.

Today, Rathod has a prosthesis arm to replace the lost arm, but it is not the same as earlier. "I can no longer travel alone in the train. My wife has accompanied me so far on all the trips I have made. The prosthesis arm is useful. Using the sensory systems in it, I can even manipulate the fingers of this arm. I am now able to hold a glass of water and drink it as well, using this arm. But it's much heavier than a regular arm. And it takes time to manipulate," he demonstrated.

The government compensation was not enough to provide for a prosthesis arm. Hence, Rathod, had no choice but to accept aid from a trust. "The government compensation was Rs50,000 and the Railways gave me an ex-gratia sum of Rs45,000. But the prosthesis arm costs Rs750,000. I did not know where I would get so much money from. A reporter, who had interviewed me earlier, recommended the Bombay Community Public trust, which paid for my arm. But I had to finance my ear surgeries."

After nearly two and a half months in the hospital and subsequent surgeries lasting almost a year, Rathod's has had little alleviation from physical agony due to the injuries. "I have bomb particles and shrapnel lodged in my body, which pains terribly most of the times. The medication has resulted in boils all over my body. I am trying hard to not depend on the pain killers. But sometimes the pain is unbearable."

Naturally, all these travails have affected his family, especially his two daughters, the eldest of who is 13 years old and the younger is 10 years old.  "I have not been able to spend much time with them," he lamented. "Everyday so far has just been another trip to the hospital, and my wife has accompanied me on every single trip. Of course, we have very good neighbours, who take care of them while we are away. But still….there is always those little things that only a parent can provide."

However, Rathod thankfully, has his employment intact. He was able to garner leave for a year, owing to a very good attendance record at his place of work since the past 33 years. "I will rejoin my work in a month and a half's time," he said. "Since my work earlier was mostly field work, I could not continue with it. I'll now take up a desk job. I have even begun practicing to write with my left hand. But I don't know if I'll be able to travel to my work everyday…….must see….." he trailed off.

"I have become very dependent on others. I cannot even take bath on my own. My wife has to assist me," he resumed with a tremor in his voice. "But I think things are not that bad….I mean, I am already past my prime, in my fifties," he said his voice growing stronger. "Most of my life is already over, whereas there are quite a few young men who are less than 30 years of age, having to deal with an amputated arm or leg."

"No…I don't think that this is a tragedy which happened only to me. It could have been anybody in that compartment, just as much as it has been me. Finally, at the end of the day we all have to survive…," he smiled, with just a trace of the lingering pain.