At Ramzan evenings on Mohammed Ali Road, nobody must shake time out of its sajda.
Abdul is an otherwise patient person. The lanky, balding man with geek glasses rarely raises his voice while taking down orders from hundreds of iftaar visitors at the Lajeez food stall near Minara Masjid. But a gentle query from a customer on whether the halal has been done properly gets a testy answer.
“Chhuri mein double dhar Mohammed Ali Road mein nahin milega toh aur kahan milega saab? (Where else other than Mohammed Ali Road will you find knives which are sharper, sir?)” he asks, lacing sarcasm with pride.
You don’t ask questions like that here. At Ramzan evenings on Mohammed Ali Road, nobody must shake time out of its sajda. Every single thing is bound to be exactly how it was last year, or year before last.
The chicken must go through the tandoor for exactly the time it takes to resemble striped, emaciated Martians, the khiri must be just as soft, rain quails must wait in cages perched over large frying pans, the barbecue flame must leap like cheerleaders for the milling crowds and the firni must get its edge in cold, earthen pots.
Young Muslim men paddle nonchalantly in tattooed bikes through ropes of people, their tight T-shirt or elegant new kurtas showing off gymmed shoulders. And above all, Minara Masjid looms with its exquisite minarets like a benign dragon watching over its empire.
Those who dream of a Ram Rajya are doomed. Their children are sampling paya and gurda here, furtively eyeing the boti kebabs.
But those who dream of turning the world into a huge Islamic kingdom would be disappointed too. Along with the Memons of nearby Memomwada, the oligarchs of trade — Bohras and Khojas — and Muslims from Konkan to Kerala, Mohammed Ali Road, perhaps, showcases the widest range of patrons, including cross-swinging Josephs from Bandra to Swapyas and Pakyas from Parel.
Mohammad Ali Road, an artery that connects south Mumbai to the north, is named after freedom fighters Maulana Mohammad Ali and Shaukhat Ali. The brothers had joined hands with Mahatma Gandhi to launch the Khilafat movement against the British. After the war of 1857, it was the first major instance of Hindu-Muslim unity.
And as thousands of Muslims come to break roza every day, thousands of non-Muslims break their communal protocol in an increasingly distrusting and dangerous world to come and dine here, or just take in the millions of watts of halogen and a general festive glaze.
A few hundred metres ahead, handcarts quietly deliver consignments at the cracker shops before Diwali. The party is just beginning on Mohammed Ali Road.
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