I wake up and look over at this angelic creature, so beautiful at rest, she smiles a little in her sleep and my heart skips a beat. But then, she stirs, I hold my breath and I cant help but think,"Please don't let her wake up! Please don't let her wake up!"
Pretend all you like, you know what I'm talking about. I was blessed with motherhood about three years ago, and only then did I really get the idea that something could be 'Life changing'. I mean, you hear those words thrown about a lot these days, I'm assuming by people who don't know what that really means. Like, 'This desert is life changing, 'This movie is life changing'. Seriously? Try being kicked from inside your tummy, or, in a word—labour. Or even the sleep deprivation that comes after the said kicking and labour. Now, that is 'life changing'. After experiencing the said change, it did take me a while to recover. Am I a great Mom? Hell no! No awards for me, but I am the only one she has and I'll be damned if I don't try and be the best I can be, or do the best I can do. At the end of the day, isn't that all that matters?
Recently, I read an article about how having a child is a societal norm; in India, we are looked down upon if we dare say we do not want to and so on... But really, for every one woman out there who sees motherhood as a burden, or hates that she has to share herself, her time, her soul, her body with another, there are a thousand like me, who love it, not just the smiles, and the cuddles, even the times when I'm bone tired and I know I have a few more hours to go before I sleep. I know it's clichéd, but I feel motherhood has made me a better human being. So what, if I have to think of my child's meals before mine, or I have to be more organized to get through the day. I've learned life skills that no business school will teach you. I learnt how far I can push my body and my will. I know for a fact what those zombies in the Resident Evil movies feel like, I'm pretty sure I might even look like them some of the time. But then, she puts on her shoes, and asks to go to play; 'lets go Mommy', and just like that popular credit card tagline, `its priceless`.
So, The good, the bad, the gory, in all its glory, I love it all, and wouldn't change it for the world.
Noora D'Mello, 32, Floral Entrepreneur
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