Cool and the gang

Gangs and cliques today consist of people who are very different, and yet very similar. So how cool is your gang? Aastha Atray Banan helps you figure it out

We all have our gang, our coterie, that one group of people who we can be ourselves with. But being friends with just your own kind is not going to make the cut any more. Make the cut for what, you ask? To be the coolest gang, of course. So if you don’t have a hairdresser or a yoga teacher or even a photographer in your gang of friends, well, you just haven’t arrived yet.

We all remember the group that made up the hugely ‘cool’ cast of cult sitcom Friends, which was eclectic to say the least. There was Monica the chef, Joey the actor, Chandler the number cruncher turned copywriter, Ross the paleontologist, Phoebe the masseuse and Rachel, the waitress turned executive at Ralph Lauren. They were all very weird, eccentric and extremely committed to each other. If we were to use the quintessential gang from TV land as out perfect gang, do you think your gang will be able to match up?

Well, let’s start by introducing to you a gang of friends that not only matched up, but were so fascinating that we really had to stop and take note. It includes all the new age professions you can think of — so we have a chef, a hairdresser, a writer, an actor, a dancer, a documentary maker, two stylists — one who is also an event manger, a web developer, a photographer and even a lawyer. Phew, if that wasn’t enough, the extended gang includes many more people, which includes a yoga teacher cum masseuse too. “I think our USP is that we think very differently but despite that, have great chemistry,” says Deveshe Dutt, the writer. “When we meet we can talk about work, we can bounce ideas off each other. I have even got jobs through my friends, so I guess it helps us network too in a way.” Farah Farooki, the hairdresser, is also in love with her gang. “All of us have been friends for now over a decade. We all like interacting with people and travelling a lot. And I think our common interests have helped us remain friends.” Hectic schedules be dammed, they meet up every week. Because they just wouldn’t have it any other way. “Our absolutely favourite hangout is Zenzi, and once that shuts, we move on to China House and then Bling. But the place that’s really ours is Goa. We have gone there lot of times together,” says Farah. Harmeet Sethi, the stylist cum event manager and Siddharth Lalchandani, the photographer, have been best friends for a decade as well. “It also helps that all of us have different equations with each other. So one might be closer to someone, but that doesn’t effect out overall relationship,” says Harmeet. Ask them if they would include a person with a conventional profession, maybe an engineer, in their diverse gang, and they all say, “Why not? Even though we may have a problem communicating. He might find that what we are discussing is Greek to him and vice versa.”

Another such cool gang comprises of a photographer, an NGO worker-cum writer, a scuba diving instructor, a café owner and a filmmaker. They have all been have been friends since college and revel in the fact they all have such varied professions. “I think what binds us together is a common passion for art. When we meet we talk about films and all also about the various issues in the world,” says Srinivas Sunderrajan, a filmmaker who won the MAMI festival this year. Hashim Badani, the freelance photographer, has a slightly more intellectual view regarding their friendship. “I think it’s about being fed up of looking at the same things in the same manner. So when we are together, we get different perspectives of everything. We watch a movie, we see an exhibition — it’s all very different when you get varied interpretations of the same thing,” he says. When we ask them if they would be able to connect in the same way with an engineer for example, Mehjabeen Jagmag, the NGO worker, responds diplomatically. “I think it’s easier for all of us to interact as we are all connected on a creative sphere. We work with each other all the time too. For example, when I write for publications, Hashim does the photographs for me. So we both discuss ideas and it’s just so much easier.” Srinivas then interrupts and adds a bit more candidly. “Basically an engineer wouldn’t get what we are saying, and we wouldn’t get what he is saying. And then how would that work out?” he laughs.

The bottom line is this: If you don’t have a few of these talented and unconventional people in your group, you just aren’t cool. So the next time you go for a haircut, try getting to know your hairdresser. Or if you are in need of a makeover, hire a stylist, and then go on to become their best friend. We assure you, it will change your status from ‘common’ to ‘cool’ right away. As some very wise said, “We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it friendship.” Amen.
 
b_aastha@dnaindia.net