A repulsive product, rather a byproduct, is attracting a lot of customers for Kolkata’s hawkers these days. It is literally selling like hot cakes.
Faeces! You read it right.
Hawkers near suburban railway stations are doing brisk business selling clay replicas of human excreta. They are merrily striking dirty deals for Rs5 to Rs15 a piece and have already developed a huge clientele.
The clay models, which apparently cater to the human tendency of digging up dirt, come in various shapes and sizes.
When the product first hit the market two years ago it evoked quirky interest among a few passersby for its sheer innovativeness. But now it is in huge demand.
School and college pranksters, who used to depend on fake cockroaches, lizards and snakes, are now increasingly buying the clay excreta to shock classmates.
Amar Chatterjee, a second-year student of Kolkata’s Asutosh College, said, “Plastic insects used to work in school. But the college lot is a more matured one. The imitation human excreta is more effective in terrorising college-mates. Apart from the lack of stink, it is no different than the original.”
The other segment of buyers of the clay models comprises people who commute between Howrah and Sealdah railway stations every day. They use the product to “reserve” seats in crowded trains.
Soumitra Nandi and Asish Adhikary, who provide customer service for a leading cellular company and commute daily between Duttapukur in North 24 Parganas and Kolkata, find the artificial excreta extremely handy.
“Generally, we return home in a group of seven or eight. Those who reach the station early reserve seats for those who arrive late. Previously, we used to use handkerchiefs, cigarette packets or matchboxes to keep seats for friends. But now we use clay replicas of human excreta. These are far more effective. No one touches or removes them,” Adhikary said.
He said the traditional “reservation system” had become ineffective since other daily passengers would throw away handkerchiefs and other items used to secure seats, leading to altercations and sometimes fistfights.
“Since we started using this product [replicas of human excreta], such situations have become rare,” Adhikary said.
Wholesalers in Burrabazar and Canning Street areas buy the replicas from small-time artisans in South 24 Parganas district and route them to customers through hawkers near Howrah and Sealdah railway stations.
Ask them about the repugnant business and both the wholesalers and hawkers hum the title track of the Ram Gopal Varma film Company — “Ganda hai par dhanda hai ye”.
For those looking at them with disgust, the hawkers have only one word — ‘Shit!’
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