Twitter
Advertisement

Is There An Alpha in You?

What defines alpha woman past and present, mythological and real?

Latest News
article-main
FacebookTwitterWhatsappLinkedin

The public arena is full of strong-headed, independent and iron-willed women making their mark in politics, business, entertainment, literature, art... Think Angela Merkel, Sheryl Sandberg, Beyoncé... What makes them alpha? Administrative ability, technical knowledge, sensuality? Or simply their determination to be who they are, unapologetically?   
“I would term her as a successful, empowered woman. But this is a semantic tag for the purpose of identification, which does not mean that other women are inferior, or beta or omega women,” says Kavita Kane, author of Karna's Wife and Sita's Sister.

Age of the Alpha Woman
In Indian mythology, alpha women can be traced all the way back to Draupadi. In Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni's book The Palace of Illusions, Draupadi is depicted as an aggressive wife, who wore the proverbial pants during their exile. “Draupadi, comes first to the collective mind, but most of the women in our mythologies were strong, firm-willed personalities—be it a Satyavati, Kunti, Kaikeyi, Subhadra, Mandodari or Urmila. Some of these, though marginalised, were lovely, resolute ladies,” says Kavita.

She further explains, “When I say women like Draupadi or Satyavati or Kunti were strong, I mean, they were so within and despite the limitations imposed on them. Kunti as the widowed queen fought relentlessly for her sons' rights. Draupadi was a woman humiliated; she wanted to regain her lost dignity through revenge. They did not strive to 'have it all', they battled for what they had lost”.

 


Illustration: Sudhir Shetty

The Evolution of the Tribe
“Unfortunately, I don't subscribe to this notion of alpha women in relation to the epics,” says Samhita Arni, author of Sita's Ramayan, but there are others who do. Chitra believes that by nature, today's alpha woman is similar to Draupadi, “The modern educated woman has a clear vision of how her life and the lives of those near and dear to her should unfold, and unlike her mother and grandmother has more opportunities. She is not afraid to speak her mind.” 

“It’s strange that despite women becoming breadwinners, we still live in a society where women are not respected. Her evolution lies in empowerment. My housemaid is an alpha woman—she manages her home, her children, her household chores, her work and earns an honest living—all with a smile on her face and determination in her heart,” says Kavita.
What hasn't changed, according to Kavita, is the indignities that women suffer despite putting food on the table and taking responsibility for cleaning it up, “That is the part that needs to change—and hasn't over the years and centuries”.

Nature vs Nurture
There are several schools of thought that debate the possibility of an alpha woman also being a nurturer. Some, like Chitra believe that the modern-day alpha woman is determined to smash the glass ceiling whilst building a happy home, “There are always compromises to be made when balancing career and home—men make those compromises, too. My belief is that an alpha woman can successfully balance career, home and also other personal pursuits, which enrich her life. She will have to make intelligent choices and will require a good support system.” 
But isn't the notion of 'have it all' with a support system ironic? If her focus on ambition is second to none, will she be willing to straddle the worlds of home and work, all on her own—be it attending work meetings, being in school to watch her child's performance, coming home on time to cook and feed her kids? Perhaps not. But so what? 

This where the other school steps in. In a recent candid interview, Pepsico CEO Indra Nooyi stated that women can't have it all. “You can't have it all—that's exactly what mythology teaches us. The idea is to live in your world and be happy and satisfied with it and try to make it a better place to live in. And there is no gender issue here: it holds true for men and women,” Kavita elucidates.
According to mythologist Devdutt Patnaik, “The alpha concept belongs to the jungle. To animals. When humans behave like animals, it is adharma”. But what of the dharma that the Bhagvad Gita believes each of us is born to fulfill? 

If being an alpha is fighting for who you really are, staying true to your dharma could lead you to be an alpha in the boardroom, the classroom or even the bedroom. But, being tough, direct, successful and assertive is not considered feminine and attractive.

As I write these concluding lines, I wonder if we, as women, are as guilty of perpetuating stereotypes as the patriarchial systems we live in? Isn't it time we embraced the Alpha in us?

 

Find your daily dose of news & explainers in your WhatsApp. Stay updated, Stay informed-  Follow DNA on WhatsApp.
Advertisement

Live tv

Advertisement
Advertisement