Right of passage: Dressing the right way

Every little girl grows up watching her mother. She notices the way her mother powders her face, the way she pins up her hair. She notices her diamonds and pearls and manicured red nails. She watches and wonders what it will be like to do all those things. And then one day, she's old enough and she's doing it all. Her flat chappals have been replaced by dainty heels, the natural glow in her cheeks is now enhanced by rouge and her eyes are lined with colour. She is a little lady. She has become what she used to watch from afar. And while her mother is still, perhaps very fashionable, she must, she should, move a little to the side.

And chances are that as a mother, you will allow yourself to age gracefully. That doesn't mean you will be old, it simple means that you will allow your daughter to take the limelight. You will realize that however attractive a decolage you have, one on a girl a decade or two younger than you, will be the more attractive one. You may want to show your sexy legs, but you will probably know that a skirt riding up may look cute albeit vulgar on a teenager, but on a mother, it looks just plain vulgar.

There is the off chance that you are a stunning mother, gorgeous, well maintained and sexy, and you have not realized that you have aged. A little bit. You could be the one who looks in the mirror and sees and 18 year old looking back. You could have friends who tell you what you want to hear and the tighter the dress, the deeper the cleavage, the shorter the skirt; all just make you feel better. You remember your youth, when your long eyelashes didn't need 20 layers of mascara to flutter your way into a man's heart. Your giggle could turn into a hysterical laugh and it looked cute, not attention seeking. And dancing on table tops or falling off them drunk was a feather in your cap… 20 years ago. Today it is just plain trashy.

Of course let go once in a while, but remember and realize what you're doing. Be the mother who can stand by her daughter, gracefully and attractive, but look like a daughter. And especially in front of her friends. Here are some simple check lists that perhaps one could follow when in doubt.

When wearing a too short skirt, a too tight dress or a low neck, do a check to see if it is something your daughter is old enough to wear. If it is, rethink your look.

Look at brands like Chanel and Dior for inspiration, they dress ladies, you can get a tip or two.

Pairing red lipstick with heavy eyes. Don't. Very rarely does this work if ever. Don't presume you are the exception. And it's the wrong inspiration for your daughter who is presumably at an impressionable age.

Be sophisticated and fun, not vulgar and attention seeking.

However good your body is, and however many surgeries you may have done, what appears sexy to you, is a joke to others.

Even if you can carry it off, and have the body, by all means, wear it and flaunt it, just don't compete with someone half your age. Some of the world's sexiest women are the ones with the most class…

It's easy to buy the good life, but to live it well, you need to know the way to do it right!