Rainbow Guru: My boyfriend says he is attracted to me but also to girls. What do I do?

Hi, I’m gay and have been in a relationship for a year. Now my boyfriend says he is attracted to me but also to girls. Since we met online, I never found the need to confirm his orientation. Why is he suddenly attracted to girls? I feel like I will lose him because I have to compete with the other gender. What do I do?
— Mr Absolute Gay

Dear Mr Absolute Gay,
You’ve found yourself in a sticky situation (and not in the good way). I can understand the confusion you may be feeling. Sexuality is a complicated matter, which can get more complex if your partner wakes up one morning and prefers fish over prime rib. You need to ask yourself if your attraction to him is limited to the physical or are you attached to him emotionally as well? If it’s the former, I’d say there are other fish in the sea. If you’re invested in him emotionally, find the patience to try and understand where he’s coming from. Maybe he’s only letting you know that this is on in his mind. Maybe he’s feeling the pressure of being gay and thinks he can be straight if he tried. Figure out what he means. Does he want to experiment on the side, or is he just informing you and has no plans of leaving.

(Rainbow Guru is your guide, counsellor and agony aunt through the waters of sexuality)

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