Political porn might satisfy nation-building cravings

The social support and recognition that sexual pornography generated in the wake of a ban (which was later retracted) has emboldened me to come forward and openly confess a desire I have been unsuccessfully trying to repress for a while now: I want political porn. Don’t ask me what it looks like; I don’t know. 

As far as I can tell, from paying close attention to the stirrings of desire within my soul, is that political porn promises to attend to cravings hitherto unconquerable by either sex or substance. Yet I do not what it might look like, or entail if one chooses to consume it. Today we live in a pornographic world of which sexual porn is only a drop in the ocean.

There is porn for all tastes and social orientations. For the hungry there is food porn, for the discerning dandy there is fashion porn, for the socially aware there is poverty porn, for the money minded there is share-market porn, so why can there not be political porn? If there is something like a national fantasy that all, or most, citizens of a certain generation share, then for my generation the fantasy is political. I have on many occasions fantasized about going to be a foreign university like our national leaders of the past and turning into a beautiful free world frog from a third world tadpole.

Political porn will fill the vacuum politicians associate with the youth. Everyone wants to do something about politics without actually getting into politics. The situation is quite like a nudist colony in Netherland where every Indian would like to go but without having to be nude. Political porn will solve the problem by offering access and action without responsibility. People will be able to get into the gutter without feeling all mucky.

Like the string theory there can be many interpretations of political porn. However one thing is clear: just the way there are no real strings in the string theory but matter is only assumed to be comprised of strings, similarly there is no scope for politicians in political porn. It is sufficient to assume that as Indians we all have a repressed politician within us, which deserves to be unlocked. I think political porn is the key.

Just the way sexual porn is an outlet for sexual frustration political porn will satisfy the political and nation-building cravings of the consumer. A person consuming political porn will end up feeling guilty, powerful, impotent, without having to blame anyone but himself or herself.

How will it work? Well many technologies will come in handy although I cannot state presently which ones. As an example consider virtual reality which will offer consumers a chance to take historical political decisions in the garb of famous historical or imaginary politicians, in the comfort and privacy of their homes, without anyone ever questioning their motives. 

An important offshoot of political porn will cater to lawmaking fetishists. Here people dying to make laws for others to follow will not only get to make them but will also be able to punish citizens who don’t adhere to them.

People who love the capital punishment will have the option of execution.

Importantly political porn will ultimately rescue politics from the people just the way sexual porn has rescued people from each other. When politics will fail, porn will win.