Political incorrectness

Salaam Mumbai...

At the 2007 Rajiv Gandhi Awards at the NCPA on Sunday, they were all there: Union Ministers, State Ministers, Congress factotums, and that particular breed of gadflies that such displays of pomp, pageantry and political clout attract.

As recipients of this year’s awards — Sir Ghulam Noon, Shilpa Shetty Swati Piramal Kapil Dev and Shekhar Gupta — sat patiently in the front rows, waiting for the show to begin, (it started an hour and a half late) around them swirled a motley collection of upwardly mobile Congress types, displaying ever further degrees of obsequiousness and servility.

Of course there were the expected tributes paid to the late leader, the flowery speeches and the de rigueur Bollywood entertainment.

And whereas some awards were mystifying - Salman Khan getting it for acting for instance (not for his driving skills or his shooting acumen? a dowager in pearls enquired dryly) and Shilpa Shetty being picked for her acting, the Bollywood award for charm offensive surely belonged to Urmilla Matondkar, who in a short clip, praised the awards, the Congress organisers and then went on to describe the late Congress leader as the “bestest Prime Minister we’ve had.”

Move over tapori tongue and make way for Lokhandwala lingo.

Is Union Minister for Women and Children Renuka Chowdhury going to give celebrity brand endorsers a run for their money?

At a Hair and Beauty Fashion Show at the Taj on Saturday night, surrounded by a delicious slice of Mumbai’s chattering classes the coiffured politician launched in to an unexpected paean to a brand of bottled mineral water that was sponsoring the show and whose Chairman was seated in the front row.

‘I can’t do without it when I travel, it is pure and clean and precious’ or words to that effect, the Minister gushed, before making way for a clutch of Mumbai models to sashay down the ramp.

Incidentally, this was preceded by a clip urging the audience to use the same brand of bottled mineral water to wash their hair with for best results. Political incorrectness? Water off a duck’s back, in amchi Mumbai.

Now that animal activists are agitating for the ban on horse-riding in Juhu being extended to the entire city ( with the exception of the Race Course), and city ophthalmologists are voicing concern over the increase in eye injuries due to gully cricket, is Mumbai going to witness the disappearance of two amongst its most enduring activities: the sight of its rich baba-log bobbing up and down on poorly fed and decrepit horses on Warden Road and at the Cooperage -and their middle class counterparts getting their joys from impromptu games of cricket on the streets?

Who knows what will evaporate next: pigeon feeding at the Gateway, dabba-wallas at lunch time, early morning milk men on the railway platforms, hot buttered bhuttas at Marine Drive.
s_malavika@dnaindia.net