Looking for Mr Fashion Designer

Two nights ago I was invited to dinner to meet a famous American designer, a man whose name is worn on the backs of teenagers all over the world.

As these things go, the invitation was for nine pm, but people were still arriving at the Japanese restaurant in Colaba after ten — which I was informed was what is meant to be fashionably late.

When I entered the restaurant it was very dark and I found myself facing a middle aged American man who I assumed was the famous fashion designer. So I tried to impress him with my knowledge of fashion.

“Young people today are getting their fashion cues from the street,” I said, “and today rap artists are fashion icons”

“Yes,” he replied.

“I believe that if you want to know where fashion is heading, you must look at the designs of Miu Miu,” I said.

“Sure,” he replied.

“When you go to Delhi you must visit Tarun Tahiliani’s store — I would tell you to also visit Ritu Kumar’s but I’m not sure if it hasn’t been demolished. You see in Delhi they are razing all illegal constructions.”

“I see” he replied. By now, since I had come to the end of my fashion knowledge, I thought I would continue the conversation by asking him what his new line was. You never ask designers what their new work was, my friend Bandana Tewari had informed me — you say ‘line’

“What does your latest line take inspiration from?” I asked the world famous American designer.

“I think you are mistaking me for some one else,” he said, “ I am the Consul General for America.”

After this minor debacle I was ushered to my seat by my host and handed the menu for the dinner. There were many different options, and it took me and most of the other guests a long time to work out which dish followed which course. But it was all a bit pointless because ultimately I observed that every body was served the same plates of vegetarian and non vegetarian sushi and sashimi and later a choice of black cod or sea bass.

At Mumbai parties these days, I have noticed it is not enough to drink red wine and swirl the wine around in your glass like Asit Chandmal and Anish Trivedi do — you also have to know how to eat sushi and sashimi with chopsticks.

So I was doing this politely when next to me sat a man who I was certain was the famous American designer.

“Are you going to do a special line for Indian teenagers?” I asked.  But the lady on my right said “I think you’ve got the wrong man. That’s Nusli Wadia’s son. And he runs GoAir airlines.

So, in the end I never met the famous American designer. And I didn’t get a chance to show off my fashion knowledge.

s_malavika@dnaindia.net