The long and short of it

That old chestnut from Groucho Marx about being sari he was sarong has suddenly burst back into significance.

On days when medical students are revolting and the Sensex is behaving like a manic depressive with suicidal tendencies, we should also be concerned with a very important subject: Are Indian film stars who walk the red carpet at Cannes doing us proud with their sartorial expression?

The question has many implications, many of them serious, There are some who would balk at the suggestion that India could possibly be represented by a couple of Bollywood actresses, however glamorous.

On the other hand, Bollywood has become  a symbol of India, celebrated on international catwalks and even at the Commonwealth Games in Melbourne. Therefore, what Aishwarya Rai and Preity Zinta wear is of great significance.

Within our limits, in a world ruled by pulchritude, there is much to consider. One might say that the Rais and Zintas of this world have a right to dress how they want to and should not be subject to any nationalistic pressure.

But others say that as long as they present themselves as Indian actresses, they must bear the Indian part in mind, especially overseas.

In short, they must drape themselves in a six yard cloth and present themselves coyly in front of the world, even if the sari reminds the French of two towns, Toulon and Toulouse.

Here we have a problem. For eons now, the Indian idea of India and the Bollywood version of India have not existed in the same galaxy. So, by their own reckoning, the gowns and frocks worn by Rai and Zinta are quite in keeping with their parallel reality.

No one in Hindi films wears real clothes; indeed, no one behaves in a real way. We do not expect our Hindi film heroines to wear a synthetic sari that doesn't get crumpled on the train anymore than we expect them to look like they are headed to an NGO seminar.

We expect our tinsel gods and goddesses to be over-the-top and in the realm of fantasy; reality is for us mortals.

And so it is here. All those who protest that Bollywood actresses must dress in the best India has to offer have clearly missed the boat to Cannes.

In their world, India is a film set, and that is how they dress. As long as the world absorbs the general idea that Indian women can be beautiful, whether wearing a sari or a frock, we need not be sari nor should we think we are sarong.