Review: 'Zookeeper' is stupid

Film: Zookeeper (U/A)
Director: Frank Coraci
Cast: Kevin James, Rosario Dawson, Leslie Bibb, Ken Jeong, Joe Rogan
Rating: *1/2
          
After the portly (but this a Happy Madison production, so kind-hearted) Griffin Keyes sees his elaborate proposal (horse ride, fireworks, Mariachi band) to his girlfriend Stephanie (Bibb) brutally rejected, his lack of confidence comes in the way of his winning her back after she reemerges from obscurity half a decade later. Griffin, the titular zookeeper, soon learns he is competing with the sophisticated Gale (Rogan), for the attention of his lady, and is dejected.

So anyway, animals could always talk since forever apparently and since Griffin was always fair in his dealing with them, they give him the lowdown about how to attract a mate. Yes you read that right. Later, Griffin following some misplaced advice from some beast or the other, begins  faking a relationship with the much-hotter (though he is for some reason blind to it) but more down-to earth colleague Kate (Dawson) to make Stephanie jealous. Still later, he takes up a lucrative job to become a pompous jerk, renouncing the zoo - which is everything he stood for- all in a bid to win back the girl.

A crossbreed between Doctor Dolittle, Hitch and the more recent Just Go with It, Zookeeper is downright stupid. There were some scenes such as the ones where animals were in a matter-of -factly doling out romantic advice and a surreal night on the town with a reticent (but misunderstood) gorilla posing as a human being which had this reviewer convulsing with laughter for all the wrong reasons.

One can imagine that once the filmmakers came up to the point where they knew the audience's amount of suspendable belief would be reasonably exhausted, they probably decided against the film asking probing questions about human nature, as seen through the eyes of animals, since that sort of insight would possibly hinder their primary agenda: Making a corpulent guy falling flat on the ground, repeatedly and by various means, hilarious. Needless to mention, but this reviewer will anyway, they do anything but succeed in this herculean task. 

Performance-wise, nothing really sticks out, though the voice-acting behind the animals doesn't really set the standards set by Disney. but this is a trivial complaint given the vapidness surrounding the dialogues, and the overall story.

Sure, one could say that Zookeeper happens to be a family film. But such an excuse does little else than denigrate the genre itself.

Yes, Kevin James is likeable, inauthenticity to one's self and the world is flatly denounced and, how can we forget, talking animals! but how about some depth, freshness, wit and a finely-tuned screenplay?