What a cake-o-phony

The Film
Cast: Mahima Chaudhary, Khalid (not me)
Director: Junaid Memon

Aiyyo, according to director Junaid Memon, Yash Chopra had once signed a newcomer hero called 'Jojeph'. Drat, Jojo had died in a road accident on his way to the mahurat.

Mr Memon also informs that AR Rahman had cancelled his thousandth song recording at Mehboob studio.

Ram Gopal Varma had been shot dead at the Factory according to Memonji.

Hey, that's Memonabilia.  Or The Film indulging in some very morbid fantasising. Indeed, throughout you suffer from a sinking feeling.

Allright the concept - a buncha losers stealing money from a Diamondbhai Shah to make a movie - is provocative, and the independent spirit of the team, is more than defensible.
Alas, enthusiasm isn't sufficient.

Five minutes into this oddity and you know you're going nowhere - except into one senseless murder after another. It even starts raining cliches, what with an aunty landlady handing out slices of wooden cake. Phoney sentiments abound till you long to hide in an empty bakery.

And oh yeah, supposedly  there's a terrifying twist in the end. Forget it, you can detect the identity of the killer without the aid of any clues. Yawn.

 Any  redeeming features? Well, Ahyan Ghanim's cinematography is sharp and spunky. Plus Ravi Gosain, as a wannabe music composer, is believable in an enterprise which is as far-fetched as a moon made of blue cheese.