The rules of partying in Bangalore

We’ve all heard Socrates’ famous quote “Man is a social animal”. While that’s true, there’s always a line one needs to maintain when in social gatherings. Sometimes, this thin line, which can be near blurring, can be quite dangerous to interpersonal relationships. And when it comes to the rather small society circles, like the one in Bangalore, it can prove fatal.

What is social etiquette? How much of it does one follow? After Hrs tries answering this by talking to some of the ladies, who are an integral part of the city’s society dos. Choreographer Sheetal Sharma believes that Bangalore as a city is far to easy, relaxed and laidback to follow social etiquette.

“People in the city are too chilled out and they just don’t care. People here don’t follow these rules as much as Mumbai or Delhi. Bangalore has this very easy, don’t-give-a-damn attitude in its genes, which works both for and against its favour,” says Sheetal.
Though, she adds, “There is a certain section of people who have moved in, from the bigger cities and abroad, who follow these rules completely. This culture is gently permeating into the society circuit here, which again has its own advantages as disadvantages.”

Entrepreneur Harathi Reddy-Rebello believes that a certain sense of decorum is a must in a city like Bangalore. “We are a smaller metro as compared to the others in the country. This means that there is a greater chance of meeting the same people in different gatherings and also casually. This can cause issues if one gets too personal and infringe others’ space,” says Harathi.

Citing a recent example of how a certain guest walked into a gathering and automatically began getting too personal and even took digs at the hostess and her clothes, Harathi states, “Good relationships last only when you don’t cross that line. Be it with your spouse, parents or best friend, a certain line of formality is imperative so that you don’t end up disrespecting the other.”

Stating that, Harathi says that it is essential that one follows a few basic rules in order to maintain ease in the society dos. “The most important thing is to not get too personal and keep that line of respect. Secondly, one should always attend a do only when they have an invite. Gate crashing is a big no,” says Harathi.

Sheetal too agrees that gate crashing is a faux pas. She adds, “One needs to learn to always maintain a sense of time. One should never be too late or too early for an event. Also equally important is to dress up for the occasion correctly. Each event calls for a certain dress code. It is important one respects that. Bangaloreans have the attitude of taking everything too lightly.”
Party hopping also can be disrespectful. “I would never accept more than one invite on a night. It is rude to walk into a party and leave in just 10 minutes. The host doesn’t ask for attendance. They want your company. Similarly, it is important as a host to pardon people who cannot make it on a busy night with many dos. Bangalore has a small set of people,” says Harathi.

And the final rule of partying is to never be a freeloader. “One must not just go on attending dos and shy away from hosting one. You should always reciprocate and host dos. It is always a two-way thing, otherwise you may get branded of being a freeloader,” points out Harathi.

If you’re looking at making a lasting impression in the society dos, ensure that you follow these norms spelt out by these ladies like your Bible. If not, it wouldn’t be too long before you get phased out.