Faking news: Allies irked govt fears army more than them

Upset by news reports that the government was spooked when two small regiments of the army moved towards New Delhi on the night of January 16, UPA allies have asked the prime minister to explain if the government considered the army as its number one threat, a position of power previously held by coalition partners.

“This is totally disappointing,” a Trinamool Congress MP told Faking News on the condition of anonymity. “We have threatened to bring this government down on petrol price hike, railway fare hike, NCTC (National Counter-Terrorism Centre), and other issues; and yet the government believes it is the army that will bring them down!”

The Trinamool MP further revealed that an emergency meeting of all party leaders has been called by Mamata Banerjee to find out how they can spook the government in a bigger way.

“Madam Mamata Banerjee could give a missed call to the prime minister in the middle of the night to see if it sends a chill down his spine or not,” the MP revealed.

Similar sentiments were echoed by MPs belonging to parties like DMK, NCP, JMM, and RLD.

“This is an era of coalition politics, not military coups,” an NCP MP said. “It is indeed puzzling how the government can afford to be wary of the army movement, when the movement of one party from the coalition can bring down the government, that too without any bloodshed.”

“Precisely!” said RLD leader Ajit Singh, who became a cabinet minister for civil aviation just before the Uttar Pradesh assembly elections, supporting the views of like-minded UPA allies. “Forget the air force, the government should worry more about Air India.”

Ajit Singh candidly admitted that he was worried over the lack of news reports about the government’s dependence on allies and a sudden surge in news reports about the trust deficit between the government and the army.

“I don’t want to feel like an employee of Kingfisher Airlines, whose job could go anytime,” Ajit Singh said. “I am sure the government needs allies like me to remain in power, and they must worry about us more than worrying about General VK Singh.”

Political experts too believe that the UPA allies and other political parties ‘friendly’ to the Congress party were jealous of the current army chief, who is suddenly being seen as a threat to the government.

“Notice how parties like the Samajwadi Party and RJD, who are not a part of the coalition but support the government from outside, were most vocal in criticism and asked for immediate sacking of General VK Singh,” an expert pointed out. “These parties don’t want the army to replace them as power centers that can arm twist the government.”

When contacted, the Prime Minister’s Office refused to comment on the issue. They even refused to order ‘UPA allies’, ‘parties supporting from outside’, and ‘armed forces’ in an increasing or decreasing order of threat to the stability of the government.

“Hey, we are also a threat to the government!” a BJP MP claimed as this reporter framed his questions, but the claim was
ignored.

Rahul Roushan thinks he can make some sense through nonsense. He attempts the same through his news satire
website www.fakingnews.com