There is no two ways about the fact that boys and girls are different. In their emotional make-up, in their physiology and biology, their social aspect and primarily the psychological frame work.
These differences begin at childhood and run across their lives, but if ever the differences are quite visible psychologically and emotionally, it is at the age of adolescence. Though both genders share the same set of challenges during adolescence, boys come out quite vulnerable at the end.
This is an age when they are discovering and experimenting with relationship or sex, and boys are a little less equipped than girls in the understanding and emotional maturity.
They are more impressionable, want to make a quick impression and are struggling to decide whether they are boys or men.
Girls are bold daring, often sexting, using explicit words to entice boys, sometimes just out of fun, sometimes to compete with other girls. The new age gadgets make it possible for unwanted pictures and suggestive poses to be exchanged.
All boys and girls are on a relationship prowl, talking and trying their chance with multiple friends. Often outgoing, well built or good looking boys find girl friends easily, the quieter one take a while to discover a relationship, since the quiet guy needs to make the first move which he often finds difficult.
Break ups are hard to handle. Often boys withdraw, become reticent, their academic grades fall, they do not concentrate at school or games, and they are on an emotional high, often reactive to most situations. Some take to alcohol or even drugs. Their ego is hurt, often they clam up, have nowhere to turn to, parents, teachers and counselors are judgmental. Their self respect needs boosting and this come from appreciation by girls.
During this dark period of nursing a break up, attention from any girl will do, just about anybody and these boys are seen pairing up with girls on social networks like facebook.
Being cheated upon is the biggest blow to boys as the cliché goes boys are literally consumed by thoughts of girls at the fragile age of adolescence and rejection and the shame associated with being cheated upon is a huge disappointment to these young boys.
It is much later in life that the survival instincts and Darwin’s theory kicks in, much later that emotional stability sets in and boys grow up to be the ‘man in the family’ . But the process to manhood is slow, painful and needs constant attention and nurturing.
Manjula pooja shroff
The writer is an entrepreneur and educationist