Conclusions spoil it all

While I sit and write this on the first day of the year, the morning is beautiful – it everyday is. But, there is something special about January 1. There is a refreshing charge to the day. Brighter and shinier. Present pregnant with the future.

As we take the leap into the leap year, like I said last week, why do we always have to wait for a new beginning? And once the beginning is made, why is it always drawn to a conclusion?

New Year resolutions at the start of the year, followed by a reality check at the end of the year to gauge the attainment of goals set during the course of the year are a universal given.

Why does everything have to be conclusive? While New Year’s Eve and the New Year should be celebrated to mark the end of the year and the beginning of the New Year, it shouldn’t always hold us accountable for our achievements or failures.

Life is a continuous process and shouldn’t be dictated by a calendar. The journey is always as much or more enjoyable than the destination – a fact understood or adapted by very few.

People are conclusion focused. Right from childhood, it’s always about conclusions – birth, education, career, marriage, children, so on and so forth.

While everyone embarks on such an indispensable journey and there is no escape from it, life can be so much easier, slower, enjoyable and more liveable if not controlled by conclusions. One impatiently awaits the completion of one’s studies only to be bogged down by work later.

As the initial excitement of a new job wears off, one is soon reminded of the earlier schooling/college phase seeming so much better than the present. Somehow, most of the times, the past always seems better than the present in retrospect.

Two people going around always have their happiness dependent on their marriage at some point. Instead of enjoying every bit of their relationship, after a certain time, their focus is primarily on their upcoming/impending marriage.

Again, a conclusion. Once united in a marriage, the brief marital bliss is replaced by a longing to be blessed with a child. Upon the arrival of a child (again a conclusion), the emphasis changes to another denouement.

After all conclusions are ends. And by no means do we want to spoil it all!!

Relationship and couples therapist. Helps couples and individuals deal with their relationship problems effectively