There was a time when Mumbai (was it Bombay then?) had a reputation for maintaining traffic and lane discipline; Delhi was notorious for flouting every rule in the book. In 21st century India, the reverse is true — Mumbai is the boorish capital of road sense among metros.

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One can see motorists on Delhi roads not stopping their cars on zebra crossings even late night; in Mumbai, even in broad daylight, we do not care about what is reduced to a cool white-and-black design at signals. And if there is no cop around, you can be sure that the signal will be broken, and if not, there will be egging — by way of constant honking — from the back-row vehicles to break the rules.

You can almost hear them say, “There is no cop around. Why are you not moving?” Without traffic cops at any signal, Mumbai’s motorists are like schoolchildren minus a teacher in the class.

Mumbai roads are full of characters, all unruly at once.

The car owner: He  thinks he owns the road. Constant honking and occupying every inch of space available is his favourite pastime.

The motorcyclist: Ditto the car owner, except that he thinks every centimetre of space is to be occupied. This community (by and large a menace) has grown by huge numbers over the years in the city. He thinks the road with traffic is a maze game, apart from carrying an impression that in a jam, pavements are an extension of the road.

HMV driver: Those behind the wheels of Neeta Transport and the likes, dumpers, water tankers and trucks make the BEST driver look like a novice at rash driving. This lot thinks the flyovers were built for them — sometimes you can see all three lanes of a flyover occupied by three heavy vehicles on the climb trying to outdo one another. No action can be taken against the dumpers, the single biggest flouter of all rules, because some politico or the other owns them. Almost every other city bans their entry from morning to night. Here, they have a free run.

The pedestrian: S/he does not want skywalks which could circumvent not only traffic but also pollution. Instead, they want only jaywalks. You build them footover bridges (eastern and western express highways) but darting across the road is their favourite pastime. You make swanky subways (Metro cinema), but till the police herds them like cattle by holding a rope, they will not learn.

The police: When easy money — we are not talking of the ones that are slipped between the licence or RC book — can be made by fining people for talking on phones and not wearing seat belts, why should they care about vehicles stopping on zebra crossing? Incidentally, Diamond Garden is the worst spot for this. Once known for “challaning” for lane-cutting, the traffic force looks the other way for such petty offences. They do not even hear wanton honking at signals, and also near hospitals.