Friends, who come in plenty when you are a child, suddenly become a rare commodity when you step into adulthood — especially when you relocate. Most people you meet in your new surroundings will already be comfortably in their cliques and breaking into one is quite a Herculean task.

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So is it possible to somehow empower ourselves and our children with a set of ‘fitting-into-a-group’ skills that come in handy as they grow up?

When you look around, those who play a sport have it a bit easy finding a community. Racket sports like badminton and tennis find a prominent place in neighbourhood clubs.

There will already be well-settled groups playing in their designated time slots, but a good player is always welcomed. The saying goes that you either have to be a pretty girl in a pigtail or an above average player to be accepted into a club.

Well, being a pretty girl is not in everyone’s reach, so the next best is to get good at a sport! A few years of training under a professional coach will enable anyone to play a sport confidently. This will prove to be not only a valuable social skill, but also an exercise regime that is easy to stick to.

Chess is a game with a universal appeal. In a college hostel or an office cafeteria, you will always find some people with their heads buried in a chess board.

You can certainly pick up chess skills informally from others but neighbourhood chess classes are not a bad idea. These classes teach notations, strategies, and induce methodical thinking. Chess proponents say it helps improve analytical skills and lateral thinking — but undoubtedly it helps keep you occupied with a mate on a rainy weekend!

Then there is reading. Who doesn’t envy a reader who can lose himself in a book? When you want company, you will always find another eager reader wanting your book or at the least, your book list!

But, in this media driven age, reading for fun is a skill that needs to be taught to children. And this learning has to happen at home. When a parent reads to and with a child regularly, it is more or less guaranteed that the child will take to reading.

A well cultivated hobby or interest gets you a slot in a community of like-minded people. Your skill gets honed and you get motivated to better yourself.

You may or may not find lifetime friendships in these groups but there will always be some place worthwhile going to and someone interesting to talk to.