The quick and the divorced

Two-thirds of the cases this year in the city were filed by young couples

MUMBAI: Shweta and Rahul Mahajan’s marriage was unique in the media glare that surrounded it for all the wrong reasons. But their divorce was typical: more than two-thirds of the divorces this year are between young people within the first three years of their marriage.

“There has been a significant increase in the number of divorce cases filed in the last two years. This can be attributed to the increase in the number of younger couples filing for divorce,” says Savita Pandit, acting deputy registrar at the family court in Bandra. “These couples are rigid, refuse to compromise, and don’t mind a separation irrespective of whe-ther they have kids. Counselling doesn’t help either.”

So far nearly 7,000 divorce cases have already been filed at the family court this year, and the number is expected to reach 7,200 by year-end — 60 per cent more than the 4,500 cases filed in 2005. Couples in the 25-35 age group accounted for 70 per cent of the cases, and 85 per cent of them were filed in the first three years of marriage. The third year appears to be the most fragile, with nearly half of all cases having been filed during that time. 

The reasons given for breaking up marriages have also changed.  

“Earlier, cruelty, desertion and harassment used to account for two out of three cases. But in the last two years, compatibility has been cited in a majority of the cases. This is linked to the fact that most of the cases this year have been filed by younger couples, who mostly complain of attitudinal problems while filing for divorce,” explained Savita Pandey. 

Sheena Dixit, a marriage counsellor, explains, “Attitudinal problems can vary from a perception of a husband having a slack attitude to family responsibility, or a wife who earns more than the husband, a dominating husband or a wife wanting a male friend.”

She says the changing role of women has become a major factor. “Women’s lives have changed, along with their perception of equality and what they are entitled to expect from a man. Young women today want a friendly husband rather than a dominating one. My clients complain that their husbands come in the way of their career aspirations.”

“It was the toughest decision in my life,” says 27-year-old Nivedita Bose, an advertising executive, who parted ways with her husband three years after wedlock. “Ours was an arranged marriage. The initial year was fine, but sometime in the second year, my late hours of work, the income disparity (I earned more than my husband) and the rapport I shared with my male colleagues all started becoming the cause of daily fights. Eventually we decided to part ways, even though we had a one-year-old daughter.”

Annish Choudhary, a 30-year-old banker, who married his girlfriend after courting her for two years, couldn’t put up with marriage for more than two years. “We even tried counselling, but nothing helped.”

But as the number of divorce cases takes off, the system is hard put to cope with this trend. There are 6000 divorce cases currently pending at the family court in Bandra. “Most of my clients are so upset with their partners that they want quick divorces. But the Indian law is yet to catch up with this trend. Irrespective of how upset a couple is with each other or whether they mutually want a quick divorce, a year of separation along with a six-month divorce procedure is still a must,” says Sujata Tipnis, an advocate in family matters.

But Rajan Bhosale, a marriage counsellor, offers a counterpoint:  “The throwaway culture cannot be applied to a marriage.”

a_anita@dnaindia.net