Brown’s new name is a tongue-twister

Nobody even dreams of selling coal to Newcastle anymore but Britain’s famous retail store Marks and Spencer has gone one step further — sending curry to India.

The department store which has always been regarded as ‘must stop’ for all Indians coming to the UK has opened 12 stores in India and has now decided that it will sell its ‘Made in Britain’ curry sauces and canned curry in their food hall in Delhi.

The Cremay Tikka marinade on sale in Delhi is made in their factory in Littleborough, Lancashire, while the chicken curry is from Chichester in Sussex. M&S feels it won’t upset Indians as their foods are very authentic and made by top Indian chefs.

They even went as far as explaining that many of the spices they used were sourced from India.

At a time when department stores in the UK are being encouraged to sell local produce in order to reduce their carbon footprints, M&S seems completely oblivious to the air miles notched up by their tinned curries and pastes.

More importantly M&S tinned curries in Britain are generally made for English tastes —  sweet, thick and creamy — even if they are made by Indian chefs. So how will these flavours go down Indian palates? The proof of the curry is in the eating! 

Imran Khan, cricketer-turned-politician is lucky that he has remained on good terms with his ex-wife Jemima because she has become the most high-profile protagonist for democracy in Pakistan.

Last week the English socialite and heiress joined a handful of demonstrators outside Downing Street demanding the British government persuades General Musharraf to return to democracy.

This Sunday, she brought in more troops by taking son Qasim with her to a demo outside the Pakistan High Commission.

The eight-year-old youngest son of Imran and Jemima held up a picture of his father with the words ‘Release Imran, Release My Aba’ written across it. Jemima’s mother Lady Annabel — after whom London’s famous nightclub Annabel’s is named — also joined the protest to show solidarity with her ex-son-in-law.

Indians are used to politicians having to don different hats as mark of respect for regional dress and customs, but they have never had to change their names.

The British Prime Minister suddenly found his name changed from Gordon Brown to ‘Govardhan’ Brown when he went to the diwali celebrations at the House of Commons.
Ramesh Kallidai, general secretary of the Hindu Forum UK decided that Brown could only become an honourary Hindu if he changed his name.

Unfortunately Brown had enough problems pronouncing ‘Namaste, diwali mubarak and saal mubarak’, that I think saying his new name was way out of his league. Kallidai should have been a bit kinder to Brown and chosen something a little easier.