No sex please, we’re South Asians!

TORONTO: “I’ve never wanted to be a banker, lawyer or accountant. Instead, I always wanted to encourage women of colour to talk about the things mum never spoke about… the same that make teenagers giggle & blush… the same that till today remains hush-hush within the four walls of our desi homes…” says Manjeet Birk, a sexual health educator based in Toronto.

And, the topics she touches could range from titillating toys, sexual ‘siksha’ or even wanton vibrators!

For those who’ve never heard terms like the jumpin ‘n’ dancing Rabbit Habit or a designer dildo, let alone have close encounters with them — help comes in the form of Manjeet Birk, who takes pride in being a sexual health educator, giving a hand to women of colour wanting to explore and rediscover their “sexuality.” Toying with the idea of bringing taboo subjects out into the open, Manjeet lends her expertise to women of varied origins and sexual preferences at “Good for Her,” a Toronto-based store celebrating women's sexuality in a unique way.

Tucked away in a discreet cornerstone in the city's downtown area —amazement, shock, bewilderment are some of the emotions that may run through an average South Asian's mind while rummaging through the contents of the store. A wide range of stimulators, vibrators, massagers and such leave little to the imagination. As pink fluffy undergarments peek from a corner of the store and several books on erotica and sexual ecstasy wink in wanton display — magic potions, soothing gels and bath oils and other sensuous tools beg for reckless attention.  And, Manjeet gives it to them in abundance. “This is a wearable dildo,” she says picking up the giant, colourful gizmo. And, before you can figure out the first thing about this thingamabob, she manages to bring its limpless body to life with the stroke of a button.

“High speed, low speed,” she says matter-of-factly, with the same élan of a good salesman, explaining the features of the newest wonder toy in the market.

Taking you on an exotica tour within the store, Manjeet strokes, rubs and caresses the toys just like a little girl would her Barbie Doll. “It’s a culture thing,” explains Manjeet, sensing your embarrassment.

“As South Asians, we never discuss matters relating to our own sexuality, let alone be open to the things happening around us. While, we are becoming more aware of the differences that exist in our society today, it somehow is still hard for us to look them in the eye and accept them within our own families and homes,” she says as she finds you gazing away from the ‘house full of toys.’

While South Asians may shy away from browsing and digging deeper into the different playthings that excite, entice and enthrall — it also says a lot about the community’s approach towards sexuality and other gender-related issues.

Manjeet is an anti-racist, feminist activist and her work redefines what it means to be a “good Indian girl.”