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Why emotional quotient (EQ) matters more than intelligence quotient (IQ) in children

Tuesday, 1 July 2014 - 7:26am IST | Place: Pune | Agency: dna

Inspite of being smarter with their higher intelligence quotient levels, children are not so smart about feelings. They are showing disturbing trends of increased anger issues, loneliness, aggression and impulsive behavior. dna asks readers how to deal with these changes
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EQ is definitely more important than IQ...

Emotional Quotient measures the aspects of emotions and the personality. It understands the person or the child better. Even if a child has high IQ, he might not have a high EQ. He could be an unbalanced person when it comes to emotions. Parents can help their children develop their emotional side or EQ by engaging them into more social activities and interactions or giving them books etc. They should give them more exposure in terms of emotions and compassion towards self and others. They should be given a chance to speak up their mind and not be reserved. They should be allowed or made to develop their hobbies or outdoor activities. They should be more exposed and should grow in an emotionally rich environment. The school can help because getting along with classmates and teachers is very important for over all development. They can give assignments and projects related to a topic that the child likes. And the child himself should do it because I know many parents who do their child’s projects.
Dr Seema Darode, Clinical Psychologist

Kids are under a lot of pressure...

Our past shapes our present. Every experience in life, is encoded in our brain as memories. Some memories form a part of our coherent narrative; a story which makes sense. Such memories are called ‘explicit’ memories and can be recalled. Our implicit models can manifest as a feeling in our bodies, an emotional reaction, a perceptional bias in our mind’s eye, or a behavioral pattern of response. We do not realise we are being biased by the past; we may feel with conviction that our beliefs and reactions are based on our present good judgment. If this be the case then it is very important that the parents have a high EQ and help their children to handle their emotional distress. Then the implicit memories encoded will help them not only in their childhood but all their lives. Emotional Intelligence in children predicts better relationship with their peers and at home, well-balanced outlook on life i.e better resilience, better focus and attention for school work and control impulses by delaying gratification. This is all the more important these days when the child is under so much pressure.
Ebe Chaney, Leadership, EQ & Life Coach

80% of childrens’ success depends on EQ

The skills of emotional intelligence commonly referred to as EQ can be learnt as against IQ which is like a genetic lottery. Enormous amount of data is piling up regarding importance of EQ in child’s happiness and success. In fact scientist have come to conclusion that 80% of child’s success depends on EQ and not IQ. EQ in children has been more elaborately divided into important skills which can be developed in children, which are - emotional literacy, emotional self awareness, managing emotions, self-motivation, relationship skills, empathy, problem solving skills and skills related to conflict resolution. The formation of mature neural networks between thinking brain and emotional brain establishes the basis of EQ. These neural interconnections are in immature form to begin with in a child. As the child grows the experiences, interactions he perceives actually cause these neural networks to mature. This process is called as hard-wiring. We as parents or teachers have to choose to either take an active part in this hard wiring or else leave it to destiny. Researchers say that we actually change the chemistry in their brains & develop their EQ.
Dr Sandeep Kelkar, Certified expert, emotional intelligence & pediatrician


Promote social activities...

Intelligence quotient is for personal development where as Emotional Quotient is for social development. EQ helps a child understand self and others and helps him deal with the emotions. EQ helps a child understand the feelings of another person and makes him less indifferent towards other people. We can not let a child to just hold on to IQ but should help him/her develop it and control it. IQ is god given but EQ is what is developed by the help of parents and schools. We can see the decline in the EQ of a child because of computers, facebook, video games, cartoons etc. Parents can always limit the usage of gadgets by their children and promote their social activities and increase their social, friends circle. The percentage of a child is based on the IQ. But success rate is based on EQ.
Dr Swapnil Deshmukh, Psychiatrist & De-Addiction Specialist

It’s nature v/s nurture...

It is important to deal with a child’s emotions and he/she should be taught how to handle his emotions. The emotions can be unbalanced due to the hormones as well. The hormonal changes or reasons like physiological or pathological changes or problems should be addressed immediately. Intelligence is related to the emotional side of a child. It depends on the type of nurturing he/she gets at home or the environment he grows up in. The type of nurturing one gets defines his/her emotions. Parents can always tell their experiences and help the children manage their emotions in a better way. The schools can give the children talks about real life experiences or give them projects.
Anuradha Sahasrabuddhe,Executive Director, Dnyanadevi Childline

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