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ShareWhat we hear might go something like this: The purpose of relationships is to meet my personal needs, to have my own interests come before the welfare of others, even if it causes feelings of separation. I want instant gratification in my relationships. I never want any criticism or disagreement from anyone.I want to be liked, loved, and accepted even when my behavior is hostile or obnoxious.
The purpose of all relationships is to show everyone that I'm the one with the power. Remember, if there ever is a lack of harmony in our relationship, I am always right and you are always wrong. And I really want you to realise that if there is ever any problem in our relationship, you are the cause of it and the one to blame.
The ego goes on to say: There is a double standard that makes it okay for me to be jealous, controlling and manipulative. At the same time, it's okay for me to be dishonest, to keep secrets from you. But none of these things are okay for you to do.
I make the laws in all relationships, and one of my laws is that it is unforgivable for you to do anything that I don't want you to do.The ego looks at relationships in a very negative way. It would have us concentrate on differences, rather than similarities, and tell us to look upon differences as potential sources of deep hurt in our lives.
The ego tells us to never let go of past hurts because it is crucial to forever remember just how dangerous relationships can be. It would have us believe that without fear, we would not know how to be safe and secure.
The Belief System of Love: Love looks at the world very differently. From the standpoint of the spiritual self, which is pure love, the purpose of our relationships is to experience a joining with one another and to remember that love is the only true reality there is.
From Love is the Answer by Jerry Jampolsky and Diane Cirincione
