Column

No one likes being called 'nice', it's just another four-letter word

It looks all innocent, sitting there doing nothing offensive. But scratch the surface and there lies the true meaning of nice - a word that just insults.

It sure is. Think about it - Tommy is a 'nice' dog; that is a pair of 'nice' shoes and Sanghamitra is a nice girl. In short, I am as interesting as a shoe and a dog. How is this a complement? Used as an adjective, it is the most uncomplimentary of words. For all purposes, it is a vanilla-favoured word.

Try this: Choose a friend you'd describe as nice and now find a more fitting adjective for him/her. Difficult, isn't it? The truth is there is no alternative to describe a nice person. And the reason is simple enough. They are without any distinguishing quality. If there were, chances are you'd have used the alternative instead.

Of course, I am not someone who'd be categorised as nice EVER, but I haven't met many who'd appreciate being called 'nice' either. In fact, a friend once cried she'd rather be called 'fat' than be labelled 'nice'. A point hard to miss if you understand the true nature of the word - socially or conventionally correct; refined or virtuous; pleasant or agreeable in nature or appearance - that is what nice is!

So if some one calls you nice. Rest assured you are the one who nods in agreement to everything from what to order at a dinner party to which political party to vote. No one has ever seen you argue and you are probably the one spouting socially-accepted opinion.

Nice people are always there but never remembered. So, don't be surprised when some one says, "Oh, Richa, yeah I remember her. Such a nice girl", what that really means is, you are terribly boring with no original idea and I have absolute no recollection of who the f*** you are.

I for one prefer being called names - rude, incorrigible, annoying and even insufferable. It gives me a feeling of completeness and a sense of purpose. A purpose that redefines my character and make me unforgettable.

But that doesn't mean nice must be scrapped from the dictionary. It serves its best purpose to describe inanimate objects - dogs, shoes, clothes and the boss and makes for great corporate verbal arsenal. Use it to describe the management that never did you any favours; a boss who passed you up for promotion or the office bitch. For yourself always insist on a distinction that's more than just nice.

b_sanghamitra@dnaindia.net