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Please tell us we are not headed for splitsville

Astrologers say that young couples coming to them to know how their lives would unfold in the new year are first asking questions about relationships, and then about career and property.

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Matters of the heart matter more than money matters. Astrologers in the city say that people, young couples in particular, coming to them to know how their lives would unfold in the new year are first asking questions about relationships, and then about career and property.

“Relationship is what modern astrology is all about,” astrologer Bejan Daruwala told DNA. “There has been a major shift in the trend.” Young people are more keen to know about the future of their relationships than the return of their investments, he added.
Explaining the change in trend, Daruwala said, “Women ask about love, marriage, and then children. Men want to know what they should do to ensure the well-being of their parents, wife and children. Men have queries about power and money too, but these things come second to relationships.”

Ramakant Pandit, another city-based astrologer, echoed Daruwala. “I, too, get a lot of queries related to relationships from clients, particularly from the well-qualified and well-earning young couples,” he said.

The reason behind this is the lack of security in relationships today, psychiatrist Dr Shefali Batra said. “Lack of security in their relationships haunts young couples. It is natural for people to want their relationships to be secure and strong. But now, that cannot be taken for granted. There is too much of unpredictability. Gone are the days when monogamy used to be an unwritten, and yet widely-accepted, rule,” she said.

Nowadays, couples having differences would rather split up than try to make their relationships work. “They feel that they can always find another partner. This feeling — that my partner can leave me for someone better any time — makes every relationship insecure,” Dr Batra said.

She added that the factors resulting in discord among couples are impulsiveness, aggressiveness and intolerance. “They are dependent on their partners emotionally — at times, even in a pathological manner — and some times, financially too.”

But sadly, they lack understanding in their relationships. Constantly under the stress and strain of modern times, they forget to work to make their marriages work.

“Confidence, compromise and esteem are the pillars that support relationships. The success of a relationship hin-ges on them,” Dr Batra said.
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