Till dogs do us part...

"The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs." This famous quote of Charles de Gaulle, former president of the French Republic, perfectly portrays the sentiments of pet owners. But dog lovers in India are learning the lesson, that "every dog knows how to love a person, not every person knows how to love dog", the hard way.

A Delhi-based young businessman separated from his wife two years ago. Among other things that derailed the fairy tale marriage, he cited three pets as the prime reason.

"Since the beginning, she was not able to adjust with my dogs, but she didn't express her feelings then. She started by complaining occasionally. Gradually, her anger against them started going up. I realised she disliked my closeness with my pets. I laughed off her concerns, assuming they would fizzle out with time. But I was wrong. Persistent fights over the dogs slowly made us drift apart emotionally," says Nihal Khoobchandani (32, name changed), who insists that otherwise, his former wife is a sweet woman.

Nihal remarried recently. This time, he ensured that his partner was also a pet lover, by highlighting the point in his profile on a matrimonial website.

Mumbai-based animal activist Suhani Gupta (30, name changed) also separated from her husband after facing a similar situation. Omkar Rane, a friend of Suhani's, who runs animal shelter homes in Mumbai, Thane and Pune, says "The man disliked animals while she is obsessed with them. This led to fights on a regular basis. She realised that she couldn't live without her pets."

Nihal and Suhani are not alone. A growing number of couples in India are parting ways due to conflict over animals.

Then there are others, who choose to let go of their furry fellows to save their marriage. Animal shelter homes in metro cities handle dozens of such traumatised and stressed pets every month. The numbers are rising mainly because of an increasing number of upper middle and rich class people adopting pets, say shelter home owners.

Omkar himself rescues 20-odd dogs every year, including breeds such as Golden Retriever, German Shepherd, Doberman and others. Five years ago, this number was hardly three to four a year. Even if both partners share love for animals, pets become a sore point when couples decide to separate. In most cases, pets are either abandoned or sent to animal NGOs, say shelter home officials.

Rahul Garg, who owns an animal shelter home in Thane and runs Action Dogs Services, gets 12-15 pets every year from divorced people. Garg says, "It needs a lot of time and effort to comfort these traumatised pets."

Amid all this, owners possibly don't realise the trauma their pets face. Divorce is a painful process, and not just for the people. The stress of separation takes its toll on pets as well. They become frightened, anxious or depressed, say experts.

"More women than men own pets and hence its women who are supposed to compromise in order to save their marriage or sometimes to get married," says Garg, who trains such dogs and often puts them up for adoption or in security services.

Women are also often forced to part with their pets during pregnancy and after childbirth for "safety" reasons. "People believe that having pets can lead to deadly diseases to mother or infant. This is just a myth," says Rane.

"Some people adopt pets for safety purpose and some adopt to end boredom in their lives. You can't expect them to love their pets lifelong," says Garg.

"Most youngsters adopt a pet when it is small. Later on, when it grows big, they feel it is a burden and want to get rid of it," says Lt Col (Dr) JC Khanna, secretary of the Bombay Society for Prevention of Cruelty on Animals (BSPCA), and in-charge of a Mumbai-based animal hospital.

He says, "Love for animals is innate. You can't force yourself or others to love animals."