Expressing themselves over an espresso

The warmth of a coffee is reaching hearts through 'Expresso', a group of strangers discussing issues which they normally wouldn't with a known friend or family. Formed in July 2014 by Shivani Khetan, they meet on the first Friday every month at a coffee shop, with a pre-decided theme. The topics discussed till date have revolved around gratitude, reflection, fears, turning points and expectations. While there are around 641 people on their Facebook group, they even keep in touch on WhatsApp.

Khetan explained how the group was formed, saying: "When I was going through my divorce, I feared being judged by my friends and family, and one day I reached out to my childhood friend Rohit on Facebook. I began this online and there were around 28 people in the first Expresso meet."

She added that people are not forced to talk, and that anyone can come in just to observe and listen. She Khetan, who is a counsellor as well as life coach, said that that such groups were prevalent in urban areas as the stress is increasing when it comes to relationships, teenagers facing peer pressure, senior citizens feeling left out, and that every age group is facing some or the other issue.

The USP of the group is meeting strangers and sharing life issues with them. "It is easier to talk to strangers as there is no obligation of seeing them again. As women, you carry a lot of fears regarding beauty and age, and we are conditioned by society to feel a certain way. I had a fear of gaining weight and contracting diseases, but when I started coming to the group, I realised the solution was around me the whole time. The solution was small and easy, and there was no need for me to go to doctors. As a stranger, you can give and receive a lot of knowledge and use it in your life," said Skimmy Gupta who found solace in Yoga.

Khetan also said that people are allowed to share their experiences for 7-8 minutes and she has seen over the meetings that the conversations have become deeper, meaningful and many have gone beyond indulging in idle gossip. "It's not a counselling group, but a place to pour your heart out. It is not a networking or a dating site, and I filter people's profile on Facebook before adding them," she said.

Rohit Sabharwal was the friend Khetan reached out to, and he has been a regular at the meets. "Everyone has some problem. You meet strangers who have similar or bigger problems and you realise why you pity yourself. It's a calming factor, and there are things that you can't share with friends," said Sabharwal, who also spends time at an ashram in Tamil Nadu.

Deepa Rupani feels a 360 degree shift in her life as she feels more confident about voicing her ideas. "Problems that were so little felt so magnified in my mind. I couldn't open up to people and thought about whether my opinions hurt others. Now, I am loud and clear and people's attitudes towards me have changed. It has helped me professionally and I am able to talk more freely," she said.

The group has seen a recent addition in the form of saint Abhishekji Joshi who throws light on several topics discussed. Many of them say that people do not stand in a place where negativity or criticism prevails, instead they have made a decision to remove themselves from such situations. Bangalore resident Santosh follows the group on WhatsApp and has attended a few meets, and is planning to start Expresso in his city as well. Khetan's sister has already begun one in Chennai.