The Modi wave might have won the BJP the state of Maharashtra - give or take a few seats – but if they want to earn the goodwill of the people, they will need to please the finicky, yuppie Mumbaikars (aka townies). Here are some things that would endear the new government to the townie crowd:
Less archaic alcohol laws
It is sacrilege that a pint of beer that costs Rs 30 in Goa should cost Rs 150 here. And it’s not just the disparity in alcohol prices; the bar timings, lack of 'Happy Hours', dry days and the official drinking age of 25 have no place in a civilised society. In fact, if the BJP did away with dry days and made voting online feasible, they’d probably be in power till the end of time.
True freedom for single people
It almost seems like a crime to be single or unmarried in the city. Most building societies seem to be under the impression that single people are deviant sex fiends and drug addicts. If Mumbai is to be taken as a truly cosmopolitan city, all the antique thinking about single people needs to be done away with, because they are not going to go away. The way things are going, the standard Indian family will only exist in Karan Johar movies and K serials!
Defining Mumbai properly
Most townies are aghast at people from far flung places like Chembur, Bandra and Thane saying they’re from Mumbai. Going forward, only people who live in south Mumbai and can see Marine Drive will be allowed to say they’re from the city. Everyone else will have to name the sad little suburb they’re from, and Navi Mumbaikars will actually need to show their passports to enter the town.
Freeway to Lonavala
There’s nothing that gets a Mumbaikar’s juices flowing than a trip to Lonavala. But the horrible thing is they have to cross through places like Chembur, Vashi and Panvel to get there. A direct freeway to the land of chikis, fudge and waterfalls, on the other hand, will earn them a lot of goodwill.
Autos that go everywhere
There’s nothing more annoying than the times when your driver decides to play hooky and you’ve to take those things called auto rickshaws. For reasons best known to them, those annoying humans that drive autos refuse to go anywhere. When the new government is in, they will have to ensure that any autowala who refuses to go anywhere will get their license taken away immediately and sent back to whatever part of North India they’re from.