Violation of a woman’s birth-right

Women who end an unwanted pregnancy have to endure nightmarish indignities in a hypocritical society that has scant regard for women’s rights. Three women who went through this harrowing experience tell Malavika Velayanikal how it left them feeling bitter but stronger too in their resolve to assert themselves

Geeta Rao tried to dispel the chill that came over her as she read the fading letters of the board that read ‘Bhat’s Polyclinic’. This was where the senior gynaecologist she had consulted at the swanky multi-speciality hospital had asked her to come for the “procedure”. When she walked in, two others were waiting inside, looking as anxious as her. The doctor breezed in with a curt apology for coming in late. In about ten minutes, the others filed out with prescription slips in hand, and it was Geeta’s turn.
A shudder runs through her every time she recalls that morning.

A 26-year-old caught in a relationship that soured almost as soon as it began, she had no doubts about her decision to abort the pregnancy. Her qualms were different. “What if I run into someone familiar? The safety issues struck me hard only when I took in the seedy clinic. The doctor now seemed like an insensitive quack to me. Her hands were rough. The examination was rougher. When I told her to be gentle, she just gave me a vacant stare. I shut up. I had never felt more vulnerable.”

The doctor directed Geeta to another hospital nearby. They apparently rented out their operation theatre to independent doctors for abortions. The D&C (dilation and curettage) procedure takes about an hour and the anaesthesia takes a few more hours to wear off.

“The most harrowing moment was when I woke up barely conscious in a strange room, wearing nothing but a hospital gown. I could hear people talking nearby. I felt alone and scared. It took superhuman will to open my eyes, and take stock of things. I panicked and called for a nurse when I realised that I had no clue where my bag with money and my hone was. She said that there was no bag when I was wheeled in here from the operation theatre. I was stunned, and began to cry quietly. After a while, she came back with my bag. I fished out my mobile and telephoned my friend who was waiting outside somewhere.” Geeta never met that doctor again. She had paid up in advance, and post abortion, the doctor didn’t deem it necessary to check how she was.

The whole experience, Geeta says, transformed her. “It made me think about the social constructs we operate within. The system is so anti-women. How can anyone but the pregnant woman abrogate the right to choose whether or not to have a child? What irritated me most was the hypocrisy clothed in ethics and morality. How women themselves feed this false morality by letting society play holier than thou,” she says.
Arbitrary morality

There is no scientific basis for saying that human life begins at the moment of conception. This is just a religious construct. Moreover, abortion isn’t illegal in India.

According to India’s Medical Termination of Pregnancy (MTP) Act, 1971, pregnancy can be terminated when there are some maternal and foetal indications, and is to be done within 20 weeks. In fact, most countries permit abortion on a woman’s request.

However, even though one of the provisions of the MTP Act states that a pregnancy may be terminated by a registered medical practitioner if it was caused due to the “failure of any device or method used by the married couple for the purpose of limiting the number of children,” even doctors try to make the woman feel guilty for choosing abortion, says Tina Phillip.

She had just turned 24 when she got pregnant. She and her husband were on their first jobs, just about making ends meet. They wanted a child only after they were financially secure and also mentally ready for parenthood. So the decision to terminate the accidental pregnancy was clear. “Motherhood is a lifetime’s commitment. It should not come as a surprise. It has to be absolutely planned for,” says Tina.

She feels strongly that the woman should have the ultimate say in whether to have a child. “Whatever the society says, it is the woman who bears the child and almost the entire responsibility of bringing up a child is hers. Therefore, it has to be that woman’s personal choice, and not her husband’s or the family’s or society’s decision.”

But did she have any qualms about her decision? “Definitely not about the decision. My fears were medical. If a medical complication arises, there’ll be so much answering to do. You will be branded for life. I wish it weren’t this traumatic. It shouldn’t be,” she says.

Unlike Geeta, Tina had her husband by her side. Yet her experience was just as bad. Insinuating that they were a reckless and irresponsible couple, the doctor gave them a talk on motherhood. They were at one of the top hospitals of Bangalore, yet the treatment, she says, was terrible.

“They were happy to charge us a huge amount for the abortion. The doctor had no regard for my discomfort, and actually hurt me badly while examining me. It put me off sex for a very long time.” Today, six years later, she is as convinced as she was then that she took the right decision. “Abortion was the best decision I ever took. ”

Misplaced guilt
To some women, the liberating aspects of abortion dawn upon them much later. Pinky Trivedi remembers being wracked by guilt when she had to opt for an abortion a year ago. She had studied in a Christian school where it was drilled into her head that abortion was morally wrong. She married her husband, a struggling wildlife photographer, while was doing her Master’s. Her parents hadn’t approved of her marrying outside their community.

“I had unprotected sex just once. I took an emergency contraceptive pill the next morning. But it didn’t work. My doctor suggested abortion pills first, and those didn’t work either. Then there was no looking back as the pregnancy was no longer healthy. So finally, I had to undergo D&C. It took me a few months to get over the guilt. But now, I can’t thank God enough that I decided against having the child. I was too young then, and it would’ve been completely unfair on me as well as the child if I had had it. Now, I know my mind. My career is important to me, and I have an idea about what I want in life. I see so many couples going through the reproductive cycle without much thought. They either spoil their children rotten, or neglect them. I don’t want to do that to my child. I will have a child if and when I want one,” she says.