Sexist banter at work is the real culprit

As skeletons tumble out of many a start-up’s closet, workplace sexual harassment is being spoken about more openly. But there are many forms of everyday sexism, so common, they have been almost normalised. If left unchecked, these can fester into full-fledged sexual harassment and leave women feeling increasingly uncomfortable in the workplace.

Aarti Kapur Singh, journalist, says male colleagues often stereotype women. “I was once told in a strategy meeting that only ‘aurat ka dimaag’ can come up with such a duplicitous idea when I offered a solution to a long-standing problem,” recalls the 34-year-old. She also resents how married women are made to look like they shirk professional responsibilities. “I remember my former boss telling me that when I take leaves for domestic responsibilities, it demoralises the team.” She also believes that men only bond with women who are ‘tom-boys’. The inner circle is often just an extension of the ‘Old Boys Club’.

Communications professional Cornelia D’ Souza* concurs. “My former boss would always schedule team-building exercises after work hours. Important work decisions were made during that period, which I missed out on,” she says. D’ Souza switched jobs but realised things weren’t any different there either; she was called a ‘whiner’ who wanted ‘special treatment’ all the time.

Other forms of subtle sexism include encouraging women to adopt a more feminine dress code, assigning them ‘womanly’ duties like taking notes, etc. “These are all power preserving moves designed to prevent the disruption of the hegemony in a patriarchal society,” says Smita Sahay, CEO, Accio Health. Infantilization and mansplaining allow men to be condescending towards women by trivializing real issues, because these issues pose a threat to the power structure. “It is a way for men to hurt the credibility of women,” she says.

(* Name changed on request)