An empty nest need not mean an empty life. Baby boomers are playing a different tune and striking a cord with fresh beginnings. Kareena Gianani reports
“Ileft a fulfilling career at the BARC for my new-born daughter. Watching her top the merit-list strengthened the belief that I had made the right decision. Then my son was diagnosed with dyslexia. I had to cope with that. But as the years went by, time hung heavily on my hands. My husband was involved with his work. My children were all grown and had a new life and I didn’t have a place there. For the first time after three decades, my nest was empty. I was looking at a life empty of a lot of things.”
Almost 60, Kamlesh Soni is one of the many who reached a crossroad after her children were gone — a point that made her rethink her life. Countless parents suffer from this malady — referred to as empty nest syndrome. But this life stage can turn out to be a rewarding phase given a chance — parents can reclaim their lives after years of giving kids the first priority. Soni, for instance, was determined not to let depression take over. She rekindled her love for embroidery and she devotes four hours to this every day. She also tried her hand at computers. “Depression loomed large but I did not give in. Today, my second career as administration manager with Dignity Foundation has restored self-worth and joy.”
An increasing number of people realise that this juncture in life is all about feeling good, about having the freedom to pursue all that was on hold for years. Contrary to common perceptions that this stage is an end to productivity, people now feel it is, in fact, a beginning. “One can never emotionally erase the void of missing children from one’s life, but the negativity can be conquered,” says Kirti Narain, principal, Jai Hind College. “As a principal, I am surrounded by the vivacity of the young. I now have an equally absorbing time in life.”
For senior people, it isn’t just kids leaving home that brings on the feeling of emptiness. It is also the loss of what is viewed as a ‘productive’ life. Dr Pervez Hakim, a renowned orthopaedic surgeon, decided to quit his 19-hour work schedule when he was asked to perform surgeries with the help of an assistant three years ago. Hakim initially found the days passing at an excruciatingly slow pace.“I found solace in orthopaedic consultation and coupled it with spirituality, solving crosswords, classical music and travelling. Today I have a grip on my emotions.”
Comments
