In the light of Ellen

There they were last fortnight, the poster boys and girls of the Obama era, the heavyweights who had weighed in on liberalism and freedom, human rights and diversity, all lined up like ducks and drakes on the White House stage to receive America's highest civilian honour, the Presidential Medal of Freedom, at the hands of their commander-in-chief.

Twenty-one distinguished individuals, athletes, actors, scientists, people who President Obama described as who had "touched him in a very powerful, personal way" and "helped make him who he was". And it was not hard to see why: Tom Hanks, Robert De Niro, Diana Ross and Michael Jordan had been the icons of popular culture through Obama's growing years, through whose words, songs, movies and sports the young multi-racial boy from Chicago must have come of age.

And yet it was one individual, a rather weepy one in fact, who had caught the public imagination that evening and whose receiving of the award had defined it for the world.

That individual was stand up comedian, television host and LGBTQ activist Ellen DeGeneres.

In a month where every thing seemed to have gone wrong and America had woken up to its bad hair presidential term, the honouring of Ellen DeGeneres implied that all was not lost and every one had not gone crazy: it was the one bright spot in a very bleak season.

"It's easy to forget now, when we've come so far, where now marriage is equal under the law, just how much courage was required for Ellen to come out on the most public of stages almost 20 years ago," said a visibly choked Obama at the ceremony "Just how important it was not just for the LGBT community, but for all us to see somebody so full of kindness and light—somebody we liked so much, somebody who could be our neighbour or our colleague or our sister—challenge our own assumptions, remind us that we have more in common than we realise, push our country in the direction of justice. What an incredible burden it was to bear, to risk your career like that. People don't do that very often."

Indeed the Ellen story is an incredible one: At the peak of her career, right in the middle of her successful soap Ellen on ABC, way back in 1997, the actress had chosen to come out as gay on what was the civilised world's biggest platform: The Oprah Winfrey Show. The coming-out episode, aka 'The Puppy Episode' became one of the most highly watched episodes of the show, and stunned and delighted America on both sides of the ideological picket fence.

However, DeGeneres paid heavily for it, when following her disclosure, her soap was pulled off the air due to 'falling ratings' with credible sources revealing that in homophobic America, it had been ABC's parent owner The Walt Disney Company, worried about tarnishing it's squeaky clean image, who had pulled the plug on it.

What followed were years of being out in the wilderness, waiting for the phone to ring. Through those years it was her sheer strength of character and her belief in herself that had seen DeGeneres come through to the other side, triumphant as America's sweetheart with an award winning daily talk show, more Emmy awards than she could possibly have dreamed of and a celebrated marriage to her wife Portia de Rossi in 2008.

What makes the Ellen story so edifying is that she has won her case by standing her ground and being true to herself. The 'kindness and light' that Obama refers to is DeGeneres' only calling card, one with which she daily reminds us of our shared humanity and vulnerabilities.

During her hosting of the Emmy awards following the September 26 World Trade Center attacks, it was Ellen who received a standing ovation when she'd said, "What would bug the Taliban more than seeing a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews?"

Again, it was Ellen who endeared herself to people across the world when she'd taken the serious edge off academic pomp and pelf by turning up in her bathrobe and furry slippers to give the valedictory address at the University of Tulane, explaining, "They said every one would be in robes".

She also reminded us that "we need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter."

Which is why in a season when the world faces the grotesque horror of Trump at the White House and the twin monsters of extremism and intolerance are raising their ugly heads wherever we look, the fact that this deeply kind, compassionate and heroic figure was honoured gives us hope that all is not lost.

"Accept who you are, unless you're a serial killer," Ellen had once said. "Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system," she quips. See what Obama meant when he referred to 'kindness and light'?

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