'Fat talk' is likely to make women more lonely

Do you feel that if you just lost just those 5 kilos you would be happier? Do you find yourself making statements to belittle yourself physically? Are you perpetually obsessed with the shape of your body?

If yes, then you have a negative image about your body that you need to change. Why?

According to researchers at the University of Notre Dame lead by Alexandra Corning associate professor of psychology and director of Notre Dame’s Body Image and Eating Disorder Lab, women who engage in “fat talk,” i.e make disparaging remarks about their bodies are considered less likeable by their peers.

In the new study, which was presented at the Midwestern Psychological Association annual conference earlier this month, college-age women were asked to examine snapshots of thin and overweight women, who either gave positive or negative statements about their bodies.

The participants were then asked to rate the women on their perceived likability.

Regardless of their body type, the photographed women who engaged in negative body talk were thought to be significantly less likeable, while overweight women who made positive remarks about their bodies were rated the most likeable.

Corning noted that psychologists believe sharing complaints about one’s weight, diet or need to exercise is a way for women to bond with each other. But as her study suggests, this tactic can not only backfire but is also a "known risk factor for the development of eating disorder."

"These findings are important because they raise awareness about how women actually are being perceived when they engage in this self-abasing kind of talk,” Corning said in the press release.

So quit bashing your body. Your relationships will be the healthier if you stop and so will you!

Seven ways to overcome negative body image by Nicole Hawkins, PhD and Eating Disorder Therapist

1. Fight "Fatism"
Work on accepting people of all sizes and shapes. This will help you appreciate your own body. Create a list of people who you admire that do not have "perfect" bodies; does their appearance affect how you feel about them?

It is also important to remember that society's standards have changed significantly over the last 50 years. The women that were considered the "ideal beauties" in the 1940's and 1950's like Marilyn Monroe (size 14) and Mae West were full-bodied and truly beautiful women, but they would be considered "overweight" by today's standards.

2. Fight the diet downfall
Ninety percent of all women have dieted at some point in their life. To dieters' dismay, 98% of all dieters gain the weight back in five years. Studies also show that 20-25% of dieters progress to a partial or full-blown eating disorder. Dieting only helps you lose your self-esteem and energy while creating mood swings and feelings of hopelessness. Its best to seek professional help.

3. Accept genetics
It is critical to remember that at least 25% to 70% of your body is determined by your genes, whose affect on your physical appearance cannot be altered. What you can change is the importance you give body size in your life. It should not be a priority.

4. Understand that emotions are skin deep
Every time you say "I'm fat" even if you are overweight, you are betraying your body, and your underlying feelings. Learn to discover your emotions and realize that focusing on your body is only distracting you from what is "really" bothering you.

5. Question messages portrayed in the media
The media sends powerful messages to girls and women about the acceptability (or unacceptability) of their bodies. Young girls are thought to compare themselves to women portrayed as successful in the media, assessing how closely they match up to the "ideal" body form.

Unfortunately, the majority of girls and women (96%) do not match up to the models and actresses presented in the media. It is important to realise that only 4% of women genetically have the "ideal" body currently presented in the media and the other 96% of women feel they must go to extreme measures to attempt to reach this unobtainable image.
 
Models' hips and waists are often slimmed and their breasts enlarged through computer photo manipulation. Many of the women presented in the media suffer from an eating disorder or have adopted disordered eating behaviour to maintain such low body weights. It is important to start to question images in the media and question why women should feel compelled to "live up" to these unrealistic standards of beauty and thinness.

6. Recognise the influence of body misperception
Women with eating disorders often exhibit unequivocal body image misperception, in which they misperceive the size of  a part, or their entire body. This distortion is real and it is not due to "fat," but to the eating disorder illness. It is important to recognise this misperception and attribute it to the eating disorder.

Judge your size according the opinions of trusted others until you can trust your new and more accurate self-perceptions.

7. Befriend your body
It is important to combat negative body image because it can lead to depression, shyness, social anxiety and self-consciousness in intimate relationships. Appreciate your body for its individuality without comparing it to society's perception of beauty.