Review: Watch 'No Problem' if you love to torture yourself

Film: No Problem (U/A)
Director: Anees Bazmee
Cast: Sanjay Dutt, Akshaye Khanna, Anil Kapoor and others
Rating: Does not qualify

Just when you thought that with the year about to end the contenders for worst film of 2010 had been decided, along comes No Problem and beats all competition hollow. It’s a comedy that makes you grimace, squirm, yawn and do everything else but laugh.

Imagine sitting with an audience for more than two hours watching characters do all they can to elicit even a little smile out of you, but all you hear around are groans, gasps, and snores. You do hear the occasional laughter, of course, but you are quite certain someone is going delirious with what he has been subjected to.

It’s not surprising that No Problem is so bad you want to curl up in your seat and cry. It’s surprising that it got made at all. Anees Bazmee, the film’s writer and director (easily the biggest culprit), is not exactly known for making anything other than mindless comedies, but the mindlessness only adds to the painfulness in this film.

For producer Anil Kapoor — also cast as a bumbling cop — the film is an embarrassment. His earlier film, Aisha, was a masterpiece in comparison, while even last year’s ShortKut, which, too, his banner produced, would not have prepared you for this.

Of course, I’m not going to tell you what the film’s story is, or talk about its 'finer points'. Reliving it, even if it’s only by writing about it, is not the kind of trauma I want to put myself through.

All you need to know is that you should stay away from No Problem. Unless masochism is your thing.