Kangana Ranaut talks about her struggles, her fears and her choices!

She’s spunky and she’s eccentric. She’s deliciously perky and she’s all set to rule the Bollywood rooster! She’s Kangana Ranaut. With a strong willed persona of her own, Kangana Ranaut is known to be one of the most straight forward actresses today. She is unabashedly fearless and real, and a fighter who has battled all odds and emerged triumphant, much like her Rani from Queen! The actress won the National Award for her role in the movie on March 24, 2015 - just a day after she celebrated her Birthday. Needless to say, this is probably the best belated birthday gift Kangana has received.

Evidently confident and secure, Kangana has been making the right moves. Here's an archived interview, where Kangana spoke her heart out about her struggles, her choices and why she does not give a damn anymore!

‘Struggle to be there, sans any piggybacking!’

Well it definitely was a tough phase for me and it did bog me down at one point of time. But then, I think, finally everything fell in place. Like everybody else, I too have my share of ups and downs  and like everyone else even I have gone through a lot of good as well as bad experiences. Specially if you are a woman, you would know that there are a lot of troubles that one needs to go throughout her life span and I am no different! In our case, it just gets published and becomes a big issue but it is similar to all the natural obstacles that we all face and pass through in life. It is not at all different but it just becomes too much written about and hyped. People do go through a family crisis or a bad relationship and people do have bad experiences but there is nothing unusual about it. It’s the extra mirch masala in the write ups that add to all the hoopla!

‘My family objected to me being an actress’

I am from a conservative family in Himachal Pradesh. And it was obvious that initially there were some objections. But now they understand that if I am taking drugs, or slapping my hero, or sleeping with my boss, it's because my character in the film needs it. It's my job to make my characters realistic. (Pauses) You know what, you should not be asking about my parents but about my relatives in Himachal...it's their reaction that irritates me! They don't have problem with my bold scenes or dialogues, but they want me to dance, deliver dialogues and give all the details about what Amitabh Bachchan, Shah Rukh Khan, Kareena Kapoor, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan and the others wear, eat, etc...as if I am the know-all of Bollywood.

‘I was never pampered by my family’

I was never pampered in my life. In fact, I always upset them and they were quite ashamed of me since I spoke my mind. Once my grandfather, who was speaking to a few guests remarked that in our house, women eat after men in the house has had their fill. I barged in saying, "No, we always have our meal before you." This upset my grandfather and caused much embarrassment to my parents.

‘More than me, my characters have been inspirational for my fans’

I really don’t know how and if I actually inspire anybody else. But I hope that I inspire them in a good way. My journey has been really personal and I never started off with an intention of inspiring people. My goals are very personal too but if you can, you should not start off your journey thinking about how to inspire others but how to gain inspiration from everyone around you. But I do love the fact that I get to inspire people in such a way. Queen as we all saw was an inspirational film. I don’t know how inspired I am in real, so inspiring others has never been my motto or the agenda but yes it’s good to know that people love me and get inspired by me. But mostly, I feel it’s the characters like Rani and others which I have portrayed that has inspired the fandom. I live my life the way I am and I do not like to carry that extra baggage having to live a life for others around me. I am a selfish person (Laughs)

‘I am not an arm candy anymore, thanks to Queen’

I would say that the turning point in my life would be Queen! You know there was this phase where I had been working in big heavyweight films with big stars but I could not add on much to the film. I know people would come and flatter me saying I was good in the film but then eventually, I would know that at the end of the day, I could not contribute much to the films. Tanu Weds Manu was a juncture where I chose to do this refreshingly new film with a budding director over a film like The Dirty Picture with a brand like Balaji. Somehow the power to say ‘no’ and the urge to do more artistic roles insinuated a new me within. But with Queen ushering in such huge accolades everywhere, I am really looking forward to everything here. Queen came and changed the way people perceived me. I was no more an arm candy and I was this one small town girl who is busy living life on her own terms. Somehow initially the same people who felt I am too reluctant and moody and considered me way too upfront for the business came up to me and started relating with my individual spaces. Queen helped me mark my individuality and helped people get to terms with who I am!

‘Today I am doing good films so people like me. Tomorrow they might not’

That is totally true. You wouldn’t believe every time I did a good film, I was definitely appreciated for my performance but no one ever came to me with a strong role. I don’t believe in sucking upto anyone for work so when my hard work isn’t paid off well, I feel dejected, lonely but the very next moment it makes me work even better. And that I guess has toppled everything else. Today when Queen has been appreciated and I am suddenly made to be every girl’s role model, I seriously don’t take it seriously at all! (Laughs) Today I am doing g a good film so they like me, tomorrow they might hate me. Nothing is constant but yes there is definitely the desire to make sure the audience loves me.

‘I don’t really care about controversies or bad press’

Yeah, I totally feel that this is true. Its when you don’t suck up to people who are used to getting sucked up, that’s when people find you a soft target for all their frustration and stuff. Jo bhi hai, unko mubarak ho! But then, who cares? I don’t know but I really don’t care!