8 funny Bollywood medical marvels

Everyone commends the great work that doctors do, so we thought we would make this day a bit lighter and look at some to the medical marvels our very own Bollywood movies serve up. Here is a list of eight Hindi movies that have made us crack up with their purely inspired medical marvels.

1) Humshakals – The man-dog pill

The latest in the series of Hindi entertainers by Sajid Khan, this movie has people playing triple roles. But how it works is that a genius doctor has created a pill that alters people’s chromosomes (a feat that has not yet been mastered by any form of medical science) for 24 hours. But that’s not all. This pill changes a person’s chromosomes to make him a dog. The doctor proudly claims ‘sharir admi ka but brain kutte ka’. So, the poor soul who eats this ‘pill’ will be left with his body but with the brain of a dog. Really! Medical science at its best, we think!

2) Rowdy Rathore – Brain like a heated carburetor:

So this story has the burly Akshay Kumar in it playing a double role. But what’s amazing is that the actual Rowdy Rathore was shot in the head and is believed to be dead by his nemesis, but is actually alive (despite being shot in the head). But the strongest cop in the world has a small problem – his brain heats up and causes him to faint and become incapacitated (may we suggest wearing a hat?). The solution you ask? Well, water, rain or drops of any liquid dropping from a height can help. Apparently the cool water resets his brain and brings him back; stronger than ever! Wow! Now we would really like to see rain do that kind of magic on a person with severe brain injury. Who needs rehabilitation anyway?

3) Hello Brother – Organ transplant cum hallucinogen

This is a movie that has super star Salman Khan as the hero and his real-life brother Arbaaz Khan playing a cop named Vishal. The villain shoots Salman Khan and kills him. He then shoots Arbaaz who is saved by a heart transplant and no prizes for guessing whose heart it is! Of course, it has to be Salman’s. Now Vishal can see the Salman’s ghost enticing him to fall in love with his girlfriend (Rani Mukherji) and of course, avenge his death. Hmm, if people who are about to get heart transplants watched this, they would get spooked out!

4) Dil Ne Jise Apna Kaha – The ‘I Love You’ therapy – a drug that can bring back the dead

Salman-Preity are in love. Preity dies, her heart is donated to Bhoomika Chawla, who falls in love with Salman (well, she has Preity’s heart, what do you expect?) But her love is unrequited as sallubhai is still in love with the late Preity. The funniest scene however, has to be the last one where Sallu gets to know that Bhoomika has his beloved’s heart. He instantly falls in love with her. The only problem now is that Bhoomika has had a heart attack and is clinically dead. But mind you, the power of love cannot be underestimated! As soon as Sallu says the magic words, she wakes up from the dead.  Now we think if this were to happen in real life, who needs advanced medical equipment to save lives, just have ‘true love’ waiting in the shadows. 

5) Kambhakt Ishq – The indestructible watch in Akshay’s stomach

This movie has Kareena Kapoor playing the part of a surgeon (you go girl!) But what she doesn’t realise while she is operating on Akshay Kumar – her patient, who is attracted to her and stalks her – is that she leaves her watch in his stomach. The way she knows this, is when her watch alarm rings to the tune of ‘Om Mangalam Mangalam’ from inside his toned belly. First off, the watch is still functioning while floating around in Akshay’s stomach acids (super sturdy watch!), it rings so loudly that an entire auditorium can hear it and Akshay does not die of septicemia, Amazing! And all this while Kareena falls in love with Akshay and drives away his phenomenal fear of commitment (a premise that the whole movie is based on). Simplest way to make a woman fall for you and a man to commit!

Watch the video here :

6) Diya Aur Toofan – Super advanced brain transplant anyone?

This is a movie that has Mithun Chakraborty and Madhoo as the leads. They are newly married, and Mithun dies (while Madhoo gyrates happily to a song sequence dressed to the nines). On hearing the news, Madhoo goes to a temple to yell at her favorite deity, and ends up rolling down at least 500 steps (we did not count, but it sure looked like that) and suffers severe brain damage. Now, doctors who have Mithun’s body decide to save his brain (one that is the size of a chicken’s brain and is stored in an oven for safe keeping). Now who else needs a brain transplant but Madhoo! (Just FYI, this is not a procedure that can be performed by real doctors, yet.) When Madhoo wakes up after the brain transplant, she is Mithun trapped in a woman’s body!

Watch the video here :

7) Clerk – Patriotism as a defibrillator

A scene from the movie Clerk, has Ashok Kumar literally wake from the dead. If you thought that a massive heart attack could kill you, you are wrong (according to the makers of this movie). All you need is a patriotic song and you will be back on your feet before the song ends. In this movie Ashok Kumar is dying of a heart attack, his sons look for a doctor but the doctor refuses to visit the dying patient because he cannot pay his doctor’s fees. Now, his sons come up with an ingenious plan to play the patriotic song ‘kadam kadam badhaye ja’ since their father had served with Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose. The song plays, and Ashok Kumar’s heart attack decides it does not want to attack such a patriotic human being; and soon Ashok Kumar is on his feet, marching to the song — that plays again. Why do all those researchers need to spend time and money on making new drugs when patriotic songs could have done the trick anyway!

Watch the video here:

8) funny doctor scenes - JimmyJimmy – Clunk-on-the-head – a sure-fire way to cure brain tumor

This movie is a real kicker. It has Mimoh Chakraborty, Mithun Chakraborty’s son, as the protagonist of the plot. The movie revolves around how this engineer by day and dancing sensation by night beats a murder conspiracy against him (need we say more?). But the really funny part about this movie (apart from his bad acting) is that Jimmy is diagnosed with a brain tumor. While, most would rue their bad luck, Jimmy chooses to surge on, and in one really bad action sequence Jimmy gets hit on the head by his nemesis. The blow to the head miraculously cures him of his tumor! Such an easy cure for such a dreaded disease. Who said we needed surgery, chemo therapy or radiation therapy? All we need is someone ready to hit us on the head!

The article was originally published on www.thehealthsite.com