Column

Tales From The Locker Room

With the unfortunate demise of Bob Woolmer, this entire World Cup experience is turning out to be a nightmare for the subcontinent. More precisely, for the nuclear powers that now appearto have a much better chance of winning the arms race, than they have of winning in cricket.

Now let’s look at the celebrations,across both the glorious countries India and Pakistan, which in sports have always ascribed to the greater goal—not of winning, rather just participating in true Olympian style. In fact, we are getting better and better in just taking part. Weare probably the world’s most dominant in merely participating.
Swimming, athletics, hockey and now cricket joins our exalted list of participations.

Back then to the celebrations of taking part in another World Cup —another triumph in teaching the world that it’s not about winning or losing, but simply of going there and then turning around and coming back to commemorate this feat.

Incidentally, members of the world’s most august and empathetic body, the JMU, have demolished Mahendra Singh Dhoni’s well-earned dream house. This gesture of goodwill is fuelled by the idea that he will now have something to do with his time post the World Cup.

Calcutta and Delhi not to be outdone, returned back to India’s national sport—that of burning effigies. Across the border in country ‘P’, Inzy’s family has received threats, and the army has to divert its special forces to protect cricketers. As I write this, we’ll know India’s exact fate. But sadly, it seems linked to Pakistan! So let’s do the mature thing, the adult thing. Let’s start burning, demolishing, maiming and killing till it’s time to take part again.