Column

Tales From The Locker Room

An event took place in Mumbai not so long ago. This was, of course, the second greatest athletic contest ever known to man. Bigger than the super Bowl, with larger viewership than the Soccer World cup, and second only to the Bi-Annual South American Wet T- shirt contest held in Venezuela, which is held whenever there’s a threat of a revolution.

The event I’m waxing about is the Mrs. Gladrags India 2007 contest. It is considered by many to be the ultimate in passion, commitment and sporting excellence.

Twenty-two of the most gorgeous beauties from all over India, assembled on one extremely happy stage. This revelation was followed by a succession of news. The good news was none , not one of the 22 mentioned Mother Theresa, the bad news? All 22 beauties are happily married, at least, at the point of writing this article.

The event, as always, was organised by the extremly elegant Maureen Wadia and her team. Maureen,, it must be said, could give the winner a run for her money, even today. The team consisted of a choreographer called Ben Hur, eight horses and a chariot.

At least, that’s what I imagined when I was introduced to Ben Hur. Unfortunately, there was no chariot. Drawing on my experience of hopes, I suggested to the team that the Gladrags Girls be made to take part in various sub-competitions, like jumping through a hoop of fire, wearing only garters and necklaces. My suggestion was shot down on the flimsy grounds that the necklaces could catch fire andthe jewelleryhad to be returned to the store.

As for the actual contest, the contestants paraded, the men gawked, and the women grumbled. The judges led by Sunjay Dutt, Sanjay Gaghhvi and Anupam Kher, obviously rose to the occasion and acquitted themselves well, in spite of it being such a daunting task .

So, congratulations are due to Mrs. Jimmy Nanda the eventual winner. And, all the best to Mr. Nanda, whose troubles are just beginning.