Column

Not everyone is happy with Slumdog Millionaire. For instance, stray dogs from a slum settlement watched this film and came out barking angrily. “We’ve been misinformed,” they protested. “This film isn’t about us. We’re the real slum dogs.” They discussed filing a PIL, slapping a defamation case against the film-makers, demanding a ban on the film and running riot outside multiplexes by biting people queuing up to watch the film. But then they realised that’s how political goons and publicity-hungry people among humans would behave. “We can’t stoop down to their level of immaturity,” the slum dogs decided and called off the agitation.

However, they were hurt that there were humans protesting against the film for being equated with dogs in its title. “Aren’t we man’s best friend?” they wondered. “Aren’t we more loyal to them than they are to each other? So how come they take offense to the film’s innocuous title and file a defamation case against an actor and a music composer without having the common sense to realise they have nothing to do with deciding the title of a film?”

These stray dogs expressed concern that while action is being initiated against them for causing nuisance by barking or chasing vehicles on the streets, nothing was being done to curb humans from behaving like them. The canine community pointed out that the release of a high-profile film is always preceded by a stay order from the court, initiated by some guy hungering for 15 minutes of fame. “Then there are who vandalise multiplexes and hotels on the pretext of protest,” the dogs pointed out. “How come these mobs didn’t offer to storm the Taj or the Oberoi to fight terrorists and rescue the hostages? How come their anger and bravado is restricted only to damaging public property?” Finally, the slum dogs concluded, “It’s we who should feel insulted about being equated with humans!”