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After Effects

The media is helping me keep track of my friends in the film industry. Because, the moment they buy a flat or a new piece of furniture or they fall sick, it gets duly reported in the newspapers, which in turn promptly gets flashed on television tickers. In fact, I get worried when someone isn't in the news for more than a week.

And I am tempted to call them up and ask, "Is everything ok with you? I mean, I was worried because there's been no news about you in the media recently! The last time you had dysentery, it was on page one! And remember the time you installed a flush in your toilet…?"

The other day I learnt about director Onir fainting after working out in his gym. Then Anu Malik bought a new car. In the midst of all this, I was enlightened about Hrithik Roshan's perfume fetish!

Really, there is so much information about everyone out there that you don't need to pick up the phone and call them at all if you want to know what's going on in their lives! Whether you want to know what Bipasha Basu ate today for breakfast or why John Abraham skipped lunch, there is a dedicated team of reporters out there keeping us abreast of everything that happens in this world besides bomb blasts, riots and nuclear agreements.

And it's not just the big stars or people with a great body of work who get such microscopic attention. Even those with a great body get equal amount of newsprint or footage.

Like, I am clueless about a certain Sherlyn Chopra, but I seem to know a lot about her-from her plans to do dirty dancing to someone hacking into her website. Then there is Gulshan Grover who makes an international splash every few months with regularly updated album snaps with Hollywood who's who!

I am not complaining, because all this is good fun. In fact, I am looking forward to an era of trivial journalism where we get to know a lot more about our showbiz denizens. It would be great to know how many times Rakhi Sawant brushes her teeth or which way does Aryan Vaid comb his hair.

Such priceless information brightens up our mornings while the rest of world wakes up to terrorist threats, military coups, ethnic cleansing and ecological disasters!