Column

Indian economy is booming and my friend Sriram has been coming to terms with this grim fact over the last two weeks. Unfortunately, for him, the boom has coincided with his decision to feed the impoverished every weekend.

So over the last two Sundays, he’s been doing the rounds of temples with half a dozen buns to hand over to the first beggar in sight. But if that sounds like an easy task, think again. Sriram has not only been unable to find beggars easily but has even been humiliated and almost beaten up for his good deed!

“What’s happened to beggars in this city?” he wondered aloud two weeks ago as we failed to spot any begging activity outside two temples in our neighbourhood. Finally, at a famous Hanuman temple a few miles away from our home turf, we spotted two shabby looking, unshaven guys in tattered clothes sitting outside the temple gates.

I gestured Sriram to accomplish his mission. He approached them tentatively, unwrapping the buns in slow motion as he moved closer to the seemingly destitute duo.

But Sriram’s Good Samaritan scheme fell flat when he tried to hand over two buns to them. “What is this?” asked one of them, glaring at him and at the buns. “What are you trying to do? Humlog waise hi pareshan hain aur aap pav de rahen hain! Hum bheek mangenge lekin pav nahin khayenge!”

Sriram beat a hasty retreat and looked at me with a puzzled expression. “What?” he asked. “They were not beggars?” I said I had no idea. Little further down the road, we noticed a bunch of half-naked kids playing near some makeshift huts. Sriram walked briskly towards the kids.

But just when he was about to hand over the buns to them, there was a loud yelling. We turned to find a woman in tattered sari and blouse charging towards him. “Humko bhikari samajh rakha hai kya?” she demanded. Within seconds she had gathered a crowd around her who started scolding and hurling dialogues at us like—“Hum gareeb hai lekin bhikari nahin!”. They even insinuated that kids were often kidnapped after giving them biscuits or buns to eat! We simply disappeared before getting beaten up or landing behind bars.

Finally, we decided to try the railway station, where we found an old man who accepted the buns with a smirk. “Khali pav kaun khata hai, saab?” he asked condescendingly adding, “Iske saath ek glass chai bhi to chahiye!”