Ok, so what are you doing on MY blog? Yes YOU -stop looking over your shoulder-I mean you!!

Fuelled my curiosity, buffeted by boredom, trawled by search engines and random clicks of the mouse-what’s your excuse?

(And it better be a good one.)

Urban angst? Low libido? Office blues? Midnight insomnia? Mid-morning lust? What are you looking to fix, find, secure, restore, rejuvenate, soothe, heal or reinstate?

(Whatever it is- as one Mr Bob Dylan sang: It aint me babe! No no no…)

I’m not gonna carry your load, mend your heart, save your soul or cure your ulcers. (No no no).

I can’t predict your future, channel the Stock exchange, banish your mother in law or get you your girl.

I don’t even know your name…

Sometimes I have trouble remembering my own, I tell you!

It’s the way we are. It’s the deep deep trough of our lives it’s the Age of Aquarius… or Kalyug or Bigg Boss… whatever you’d like to call it.

And you know what? Things have gotten sooooo bad that there’s not much point worrying any more.

Being naturally contrarian I find myself sailing through life these days. Chortling over the headlines, skipping through the gloom, singing in the rain.

What, me worry? When there’s nothing left to lose, let’s all take a step back and allow ourselves a cosmic giggle. Banks that go belly up . Governments that go bankrupt. Species that go extinct. An eco system that‘s in danger of disappearing. Rainforests the size of Brazil about to be erased.

And Sarah Palin!!! Don’t even get me started on her. Somewhere, somehow, she is lurking, someday somehow she’s gonna come back. Dead Moose furs and binoculars- to- see- Russia-with on her back.

And till then you want to know what gets me through the night (and day?)

Pani puri at Swati at Tardeo. Alone. In silence. (It’s called Deep Throat)

Having a glass of wine with my Mom. (Actually she drinks gin)

Watching the sunset off Mumbai’s smelly harbor.

Smiling at a motorcyclist near me at a traffic light and frightening him out of his wits….

Listening to U2‘s ‘One’ all night 753 times on repeat. (It’s called mainlining)

Watching John Abraham dance.

Watching John Abraham dance.

So you see what I mean? If its high level funda-solving you’re looking for here-you’re not gonna get it. If its words of wisdom and a blueprint for the future –nyet-it aint me babe.

All you’ll get is a slice full of me. My trivial world view. My expendable ideology. My profound ignorance.

So come to me you bored, you lost you ineligible and you clumsy and confused.

I will speak to you in the middle of the night and at the crack of dawn. I will shout and I will whisper. I will cajole and I will croon. You will need me like an unidentified ticking suitcase, a pigeon amongst the cats-or a hole in your head.

This blog’s for you!