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ShareIt felt like I had died and gone to heaven. A pair of hands with much care were teasing and unravelling the knots in my shoulders. And as each pressure point was tended to, I felt less and less put upon and more at ease with the world.
Once in a while when the demands of coping with my professional and personal life swamp me and I think all I want to do is burrow into a dark hole and stay there for the rest of my life, I know it is time to give myself a break and thoroughly pamper myself.
In this time and age, the word pamper has a whole new dimension. Luxury brands will advocate pampering oneself by indulging. Spas beckon with the promise of tending to the body inch by inch. Jewellers will tell you a diamond is how you pamper yourself. Each time the light catches the fire in the diamond, you will feel special, they say.
But this kind of pampering comes with strings attached; namely, money. By spending it on yourself or someone else, you can feel fabulous or make someone else feel fabulous.
Whatever happened to the times when pampering meant someone would do things for you voluntarily, free of cost? My mother talks of the first month after she had her babies. She had accomplished something marvellous, and so here was the pampering she deserved. When her every need was anticipated and taken care of. All she had to do was cock an eyebrow and they knew if she needed a head massage, broth, or the baby's nappy changed.
This kind of pampering seldom happens today. In my mind the only ones who still know what real pampering is all about are babies and husbands. Both still receive that unconditional nurturing. There is always that someone around to feed and amuse.
A someone who will organise clothes and even help them put it on. A someone who will clean up after them, be it putting away rattles or newspapers. And that someone will also clean up baby spittle or husbandly alcoholic excess without blanching.
As for the rest of the world, after the diaper stage, they have to go through their days with pampering as a distant memory. So if you want something done, you either have to do it yourself or pay to have it done for you. Be it a neck massage at a salon, or the chicken soup your cook makes for you
-- Anita Nair is the author of the novels The Better Man, Ladies Coupe and Mistress
