An open letter thanking Prime Minister Narendra Modiji for #100AccheDin

Suryapranam, Narendrabhai Damodardas Modiji.

I have never met you and it is unlikely that I will meet you anytime soon. But I have closely followed your words and actions. In fact, Bal Narendra is my all-time favourite comic. A lot of pseudo secular paid media folk possessing an alleged moral compass ask if "acche din" have arrived. I as a humble Joe (who may or may not be living in India) can swear by the crocodile you caught in your childhood days to say that indeed, good days have arrived.

The challenge in front of you was greater than asking Venkatesh Prasad to bowl at 150 kilometres per hour. Yet, you have thoroughly lived up to the challenge so far. The GDP is fast increasing, the rapes have decreased and there is a general sense of peace and contentment in the country. You are like Ravi Shastri to the Indian cricket team, an elixir of hope. The morale of ordinary Indians is up and running. No, Gadkariji is exempted from running. Some people claim otherwise, but Modiji I only trust your Twitter handle for real news. So if an incident like the Badaun rape case is not mentioned by you, I will never believe it. And in any case, what is the big deal about "small cases of rape", when so much work needs to be done to convince Indians that they are all Hindus. All these so-called seculars are suffering from an acute sense of self-righteousness. When eminent scholars like Yogi Adityanathji give 'statistical analysis' to describe why communal discord takes place, they start protesting. When Mohan Bhagwatji says all Indians are Hindus, they throw a fit. Yaar, why can’t everyone just stay together like in Hum Saath Saath Hain. You have ensured this in the BJP, the way Advaniji has been elevated to the role of a 'guiding mentor'. It should be the way to go for every Indian family.

Your detractors say no acche din have been ushered since so many soldiers are dying on the border. I prefer giving them a royal snub like producers give to Tusshar Kapoor these days. As you once said, one always feels bad when puppies die. Modiji, the success of the Pro Kabaddi League definitely proves that all of us are becoming sanskari, eager to get back to our roots. It is a great move on your part to appoint Yellapragada Sudershan Rao to head the Indian Council for Historical Research (ICHR), a person who believes in the historical veracity of our great epics. Under him, I am sure our future generations will be well equipped with deep knowledge of history, aided with impeccable fluency in Hindi and Gujarati.

Sir, your Jan Dhan Yojana is another masterstroke. Earlier, every time I heard the word Dhan, I used to remember the horrible song from the movie Goal. Now, I will only remember the faces of poor Indians, living under Rs 28 a day. I am sure opening these accounts will be a game changer for them. In any case, now with homeopathy and Ayurveda set to be a part of AIIMS, medical bills are likely to come down. All this money, in addition to all the black money which will soon come back from Switzerland, will further bolster our economy.

Modiji, many believe you are merely following UPA’s schemes. I would rubbish this. All the schemes are as disingenuous as a script of any Sanjay Gupta movie. Let them not hinder you.

Sir, some people are also finding fault in you gifting the Gita to Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe. The way these petty sickulars are reacting, it is as if you gifted a Chetan Bhagat book to him. Obviously, CB is our national treasure and no person worth their half girlfriend will deny that he is best suited praising you. 

Finally sir, let me get down to business. I actually want a favour. My uncle's son's birthday is coming up. Although our families are not in best of terms, I don't think the new generation should carry on with the animosity. So I want to gift him the complete works of Dinanath Batraji. Can you kindly guide me to any book store or any shakha which has it?

Regards, 
A Happy Modi Bhakt